After a night of drinking, some food is always the best. Sadly every place we go has a problem. What if we had the perfect place? It would look like this.

What if those idiot teen moms from that idiot TV show on idiot MTV got into the University of Illinois? Well, they'd probably still have a lot of sex, but those babies would be even more screwed than they already are.

Not just in our hearts. In real life. Like Tupac, Biggie and Elvis. That would be a hell of a band.

Winter is here and it makes most people look like homeless folks. Since that's the case, enjoy all the hunter orange you see hanging around.

I'm 6'4 and I've never slept with your mom. Yet. So yes, I think you should. Now give me some money so I can invest it for you.

Michigan State is set to unveil a new logo. Frankly, it sucks, so we're going to make a case as to why it shouldn't exist. Also, we're going to bitch about it.

If you've never seen "I'm Gonna Get You Sucka" then you should go do that right now. The movie is hilarious.

You're at a party and you have to poop. Now. It's embarrassing and it sucks, but here's how you do it without everything going to shit.

This is an example of someone we would want RoboManning to decapitate.

This article is the truth. Text messages are awesome for one thing, and one thing only: Telling people things you wouldn't have the balls to say to their face.