St. Patrick's Day
- Written by Broetry King
- March 17, 2011
All you hot sluts should probably wear green.
Cuz I am a titty-pinching machine.
If you aren’t wearing the color of a clover leaf.
Then I’ll pinch your boobies so hard that you’ll queef.
I’ll be drinking at the bars by the time you’re at work,
And my big shamrock hat will elicit a smirk.
I’m not at work, but it’s none of your bu’iness.
By noon time, I’m on my eleventh Guiness!
My alcohol consumption is awfully reckless
But everybody loves my light up beer necklace.
Midgets are OK to be stepping on.
You can just say you thought it was a leprechaun.
So I’m chasing little people all around the block.
They’re short enough to stand when they suck on cock.
I can see you’re not Irish through my green-rimmed glasses.
So I’m pinching girl’s nipples and grabbing girl’s asses.
I’m wearing a button that says “Erin Go Bragh”
If you’re not wearing green, I’m pinching your bra.
I keep getting drunker as the day grows old
I daydream of rainbows and a pot of gold.
I’m getting pretty drunk and a little bit horny.
I’ve been eating cabbage, and beef that tastes corny.
Start singing Irish folksongs and everyone joins.
I’ve paid for all my drinks with fucking gold dollar coins.
I tell the hot bartender she’s not showing boob enough.
And I’m ready to make some hot dirty Rueben love!
Been at the bars drinking the entire day.
And I’ve been inappropriate in every which way.
Society, for one day, accepts my behavior.
Thank God for St. Patrick, my annual savior.