Stories By Caroline Lake
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Columbia
Yikes! The Elevators In 624 S Michigan Finally Dismembered A Student
An otherwise boring week on campus was inadvertently spiced up on Friday morning when the elevator...
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Columbia
Romantic Date Ruined By Obnoxiously Long Sign-In Process At The Dwight
Columbia freshman Eric Hampton was humiliated this past weekend when he decided to bring his Tinder...
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Columbia
Meet The 5 Runners Who Pooped Themselves During The Chicago Marathon
Ah, the Chicago Marathon. With thousands of participants coming out every year to run the 26.2...
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Columbia
Columbia Renegades Add ‘Performative Wokeness’ To List Of Official Sports Teams
With the new school year in full swing, the Columbia Renegades have announced the addition of...
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Columbia
Dr. Kim Assures Board Members That Columbia ‘Exudes Big Dick Energy,’ Obvious That He Has No Idea In Hell What It Means
At the recent annual shareholder meeting for Columbia College Chicago, Dr. Kim did something slightly out...
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Columbia
Wow! Columbia Student Jeremy Is In College And Still Wears Transition Lens Glasses Like He’s In Fourth Grade
Third-year Columbia student Jeremy Roberts showed up to class last week stunting in his transition lens...
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Columbia
Incoming Columbia Freshman Fears Her Roommate Might Be Dangerously Obsessed With Disney
For many incoming freshmen, move-in day brings a range of emotions from extreme enthusiasm to utter...
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Columbia
‘So, Who’s Top House Around Here?’ Asks Incoming Freshman Who Mistook Columbia College For Columbia New York
On a recent Columbia tour, guide Miles Russell had to stifle his laughter as one of...
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Columbia
6 Shitty High School Habits You Revert To While Visiting Home
Ahhh, high school. Undeniably, there’s something about being back under your parents’ roof that re-inspires all...
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Columbia
North Avenue Beach Lifeguards Await First E. Coli Case
As summer approaches and residents flock to the beach as a way to cool off in...