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Columbia

Yikes! The Elevators In 624 S Michigan Finally Dismembered A Student

An otherwise boring week on campus was inadvertently spiced up on Friday morning when the elevator...

Columbia

Romantic Date Ruined By Obnoxiously Long Sign-In Process At The Dwight

Columbia freshman Eric Hampton was humiliated this past weekend when he decided to bring his Tinder...

Columbia

Meet The 5 Runners Who Pooped Themselves During The Chicago Marathon

Ah, the Chicago Marathon. With thousands of participants coming out every year to run the 26.2...

Columbia

Columbia Renegades Add ‘Performative Wokeness’ To List Of Official Sports Teams

With the new school year in full swing, the Columbia Renegades have announced the addition of...

Columbia

Dr. Kim Assures Board Members That Columbia ‘Exudes Big Dick Energy,’ Obvious That He Has No Idea In Hell What It Means

At the recent annual shareholder meeting for Columbia College Chicago, Dr. Kim did something slightly out...

Columbia

Wow! Columbia Student Jeremy Is In College And Still Wears Transition Lens Glasses Like He’s In Fourth Grade

Third-year Columbia student Jeremy Roberts showed up to class last week stunting in his transition lens...

Columbia

Incoming Columbia Freshman Fears Her Roommate Might Be Dangerously Obsessed With Disney

For many incoming freshmen, move-in day brings a range of emotions from extreme enthusiasm to utter...

Columbia

‘So, Who’s Top House Around Here?’ Asks Incoming Freshman Who Mistook Columbia College For Columbia New York

On a recent Columbia tour, guide Miles Russell had to stifle his laughter as one of...

Columbia

6 Shitty High School Habits You Revert To While Visiting Home

Ahhh, high school. Undeniably, there’s something about being back under your parents’ roof that re-inspires all...

Columbia

North Avenue Beach Lifeguards Await First E. Coli Case

As summer approaches and residents flock to the beach as a way to cool off in...