George Wooden

George Wooden

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Opinion: Testudo Would Totally Beat Up the Easter Bunny

Even Jesus himself would admit that, if the Easter Bunny were to hop his way over to McKeldin, Testudo would beat that asshole down.

2 Chainz to Headline Art Attack in 2017, For Some Reason

Student Entertainment Events announced that 2 Chainz would headline the school’s annual Art Attack concert, because apparently he’s still relevant?

5 Things We All Fool Ourselves Into Believing About UMD

In honor of April Fools’ Day, we’ve put together a list chock-full of things that us Terps fool ourselves into believing about our school.

QUIZ: Which College Park Pizza Place Are You?

College Park has almost too many pizza options to choose from. If you’d like to find out which pizza joint is your spirit-pizza.

6 Best Places to Have Beautiful, Consensual Sex at UMD

The University of Maryland is the place to let your hormones run rampant. But if you haven’t gotten freaky at these hot spots, you’re doing it wrong.

QUIZ: Which Maryland Basketball Player Are You?

From one time or another, we’ve all wondered which Maryland basketball player we would be in an alternate dimension.

The Best and Worst Parts of Being a Maryland Basketball Fan

There are always some parts that will send you spiraling into a deep depression. Here are some of the best and worst moments to be a MBB fan

Loh Orders Natty Light Pipeline Built on Campus

“A Natty Light pipeline is the worst thing to ever happen to this school,” Adams added. “At least since the last time we lost to Penn State.”

UMD “Good Guys” Rush New, Wholesome Frat

He’s found a home in UMD’s newest and self-proclaimed “most wholesome” fraternity in Nu Omicron Omega.

Definitive Timeline of a Terp’s Four Years at UMD

Since we’re so generous, we put together a full timeline of what it’s like to go to Maryland