Stories By Madeline Barone
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Illinois
New UIUC Environment Frat Definitely Not Just A Front For Weed Smoking Club
After living in Allen Hall freshman year, fraternity founder Patrick Corby really understood what it meant...
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Illinois
Unsurprisingly, Purdue Student Bike-Sharing Startup Does Absolutely Nothing Beneficial For UIUC, Like, At All
This year a new bike-sharing set up that literally nobody asked for has been introduced to...
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Illinois
Oh My Gosh, Sorority Girl Totally Meets Her Future Maid Of Honor In The Red Lion Bathroom
Sophomore Meghan Williams has decided she met her future maid of honor last Monday night in...
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Illinois
8 Steps To Getting Laid, Since You Were Too Much Of A Loser To Get Into A Frat
Nobody wanted to offer you a bid after you puked your guts out at the foam...
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Illinois
‘It’s Okay Not to Make Friends Right Away,’ Orientation Leader Assures Herself After First Week Of Junior Year
A new school year means hoe phases and poor life choices for all Illini. After successfully...
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Michigan
Incredible: This Frat Bro Survived Friday Night Without Excessive Drinking, Only Lost His Juul Twice
In a stunning feat sure to challenge social norms, Jake Fisher, a brother of Alpha Beta...
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Michigan
UM Sorority Girl Claims She’s ‘Born-Again Christian’ Suspiciously Soon After She’s Unable to Get Laid
ANN ARBOR — University of Michigan junior Tiffany Stillman has decided to take up Christianity as...
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Michigan
7 Ways to Subtly Remind Your Summer Hookup They’re Just Sex to You
With your usual Ann Arbor hookup either interning or home for the summer, finding a new...
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Michigan
7 Ways to Transform Your Home Into a Frat For The Summer
After surviving two more semesters of straight binge drinking and meaningless sex, you don’t really know...
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Michigan
9 Things to Do With Frat Shirts From Guys That Ghosted You
This semester has been wild and you’ve stayed overnight at more frats than you can count...