Rusty Nuts

Rusty Nuts

Staff Writer

University of Connecticut
A Judgmental Map of Storrs, CT

Are you looking for a factual and accurate map of UConn? Perfect, then you've come to the right place.

A Simple and Realistic Roadmap for UConn to Win the College Football Playoffs

All UConn really has to do is beat Virginia, Syracuse, Houston, Cinci, USF, UCF, Temple, ECU, BC and Tulane in convincing fashion.

Hottest Take: 5 UConn Legends that Deserve a Statue More than Jonathan the Husky

When are we going to stop worshipping dogs more than brave human souls? When are we going to learn to stop misusing the term "husky?"

5 Easy Steps to Being the Coolest Freshman at UConn

Everyone wants a squad to get TURNT with and people to bang, so being cool and personable is key.

The 7 Deadly Sins of UConn

For the sake of maintaining the delicate ecosystem of Storrs, these sins must be chiseled into the internet like Hammurabi’s Code.

CONSPIRACY: What Actually Is Swan Lake Though?

The lake is oddly placed, as if our favorite fuck-background is manmade. IT'S NOT THAT SIMPLE, SHEEPLE.

The 5 Dickheads Who Make Everyone’s Lives at UConn Miserable

These people that have no regard for social constructs are what we call ‘Dickheads’ and here are the 5 Biggest Dickheads at UConn.

Why You Should Give a Shit About #TheStorrsPapers

The Black Sheep have come into contact with the secret documents that the UConn elite don’t want you to know about; The Storrs Papers.

The 5 Signs You’re A Certified UConn F*ckboy

Chances are if you don’t know whether or not you’re a fuckboy, you are. So, here are some tips onhow to find out if you are unwanted by society.

5 Unorthodox Ways to Spring Break Away from Normality

If this is your 4th time to PCB because you’ve dedicated yourself entirely to a life of douchebaggery, we urge you to follow our tips.