Jungle Fever

Jungle Fever

Staff Writer

University of Illinois
  • author-Twitter
pageviews
83371
“Looks Like I’ll Be Sucking My Own Cock Now,” says Scaramucci After Being Fired

Trump’s overall approach of running the government like a corporate enterprise doesn’t seem to be working out with choices like Anthony Scaramucci.

Should You Ditch Your Internship for Greek Reunion?

You’re right in the middle of your shitty summer internship, but Red Lion’s calling your name. It’s Greek Reunion time. Only problem is, in order to get the full experience of this drunken debauchery, you’re going to have to find a way out of work on Friday to make it to Happy Hour. So is […]

Illini Girl In Class of 2021 Claims She Isn’t Sure About Rushing

Reports are in this week from the Illinois Panhellenic Council that over 4,500 young women have registered for formal recruitment. Of those 4,500, roughly 70% are incoming freshmen. However, researchers are confused with contradictory reports found in the Class of 2021 Facebook group where many girls, including Sally Regis, have expressed that they might be […]

The Top 5 Drunk Food Places in Villa Park

Villa Park is known for very few things, most notably being the Villa Park Jewelry Exchange and a record number of dive bars.

5 Illini Delicacies You Can Recreate in the Suburbs

When you’re missing Champaign and you can’t afford a bus ticket back because your internship is unpaid, the only logical thing to do is to surround yourself with the disgusting delicacies found at UIUC. The Black Sheep recommends you only try these at home because if you ate any of them in public, no one […]

Is It Worth Driving 45 Minutes to Naperville for Your Friends With Benefits?

It’s the time in the summer when the nostalgia of home wears off and you’re missing everything from Champaign: your twin-sized bed, Monday night Red Lion and your hookup living across the hall. Do you remember it being good enough that now you’re willing to trek 45 minutes (without traffic) to get your bean flicked […]

Top 5 Illini STDs to Contract This Cuffing Season

You’ll likely contract one of these premium diseases courtesy of your shack buddy. Look out for these STDs that are affecting UIUC students.

Venn Diagram: Brothers Bar & Grill vs. Your Actual Brother

After seeing your actual brother over Thanksgiving Break, you were probably reminded why it’s nice to finally be back in Champaign. The more you thought about your bro, the more you realized his similarities to Brothers bar. Here’s how the two compare: You went drinking, now you’re stuck pooping. How’s that going for ya?  

6 Reasons to Be Thankful You Don’t Go to ISU

As UIUC students, we have a lot to be thankful for this year: we won 3 football games, Lovie Smith is our dad now, and it hasn’t snowed yet (thanks, climate change!) The most important bond we share as UIUC students is the fact that we don’t have to graduate with an ISU degree.6.) We […]

6 UIUC Classes to Take When You’re Not Graduating on Time Anyway

Since it’s registration time, here are some classes that will easily disappoint your mom while dwelling on another year or two of undergrad.