We’re approaching the end of finals week here at Pitt, however some Panthers are at the peak of their finals misery. With a fifth straight day spent tearing up club Hillman, aka soaking your pages of illegible notes with tears, you’ll wish you were taking a fifth to the face instead. Trust us here at The Black Sheep, taking shots and using Adderall as a chaser is probably one of the least weird things seen in Hellman this finals season. From crazy Twitter streamed fights to arrests, nothing can surprise the caffeine-crazed students that inhabit the library at all hours of the day. Use the insaneness of finals week and do what you do best: drink the shittiest alcohol your Panther funds can buy and try out this Pitt finals drinking game.
Take a shot for every person sleeping in Hillman
Feel free to check out every floor and every study room to increase your chances of passing out and sleeping through your alarms the next day. Take a bonus shot for every picture you send to @pittnaps.
Chug a beer every time a random person asks to sit with you
This happens a lot more often than you may think. Keep your backpack stocked with semi-warm shitty beer to keep things interesting. Never underestimate a rando’s ability to come to the library fully stocked with study snacks and a prescription of Adderall.
Take a shot for every paragraph you study
By the time you finish a single chapter, you’ll forget everything you just read, but at least you’ll be too wasted to care.
Take two shots for every person you see wearing Greek letters
People in Greek life enjoy nothing more than letting everyone know they’re a part of it, especially during finals week. If you can recite what their letters are, chug a beer for each letter you know. If you become good enough, you can put “bilingual” in your Tinder bio #score.
Take a shot for every cup of coffee you order
At least make your leaning tower of free coffee cups worthwhile. Plus, coffee can be used as a chaser and it’s like a makeshift Four Loko. If you can’t have an iv of coffee at all times, you might as well drink all of the free coffee Hillman has to offer.
Make a mixed drink for every bagel you eat
Calories don’t count during finals week. Your diet will consist of the three food groups: bagels, pizza, and Chipotle. When you consume your body weight in just bagels each morning, make sure you make a mixed drink for every one. It will be like you’re brunching with friends and if you close your eyes and hold your nose, whatever you’re drinking will taste just like a mimosa.
Finish all of your alcohol because you still have a Saturday 8 a.m. final
You are the definition of sucking. Whether you show up still drunk or not remembering a single word you studied, may the odds ever be in your favor.