The Top 5 Drunk Food Places in Villa Park

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Villa Park is known for very few things, most notably being the Villa Park Jewelry Exchange and a record number of dive bars. Whether you’re grabbing a beer that turns into 12 after work at Park Blvd Tavern or you’ve been barstooling and booling all day at Ardmore Lounge, these drunk foods will help soak up some of the cheap booze you’ve been putting away.

5.) Portillo’s:
This is the favorite among college students back from school or for anyone who’s never had a beef sandwich anywhere else. The only way you could think a chocolate cake smashed up in a blender is not completely disgusting is if you’ve been drinking a little too much of the goof juice at happy hour. The only problem is they don’t deliver and sitting through the drive-thru line at dinnertime is more painful than your wife leaving you three years ago.

4.) Mickey’s Hot Dogs:

If you don’t want to drive all the way to Portillo’s to overpay for a hot dog, Mickey’s is your next best option within walking distance. The 2 Hot Dog Special is not only a stellar deal, but the nearly ½ pound of fries served with it will sober you right up. As long as you don’t get ketchup on your dog, your chances of yakking this food back up are slim. You’re also guaranteed to run into someone you went to middle school with, which is perfect because you can let them know how drunk and cool you are now.

3.) Dominick’s Pizza and Pasta:
This is your best bet for garage parties when Ashley’s had too much Busch Light and needs something in her stomach before your mom gets home and realizes you invited your friends over to drink again. Since they deliver to the entire town, you won’t have to pile everyone into the minivan and do some questionable things in the search for pizza. Be sure to have the drunkest person call the order in and ask everyone what they want while you’re placing the order. It’s the only way you won’t forget.

2.) Los Burritos Mexicanos:

It’s rare that people go to Los Burritos late at night unless they’re intoxicated in some way so you’ll be in good company while you scarf down a steak burrito and large horchata. Since this was your favorite spot to get food poisoning in high school, there are fond memories of being stuck in their bathroom for hours. This time, you’re just too drunk so you can’t sue them, but they’ll probably still give you free chips and salsa.

1.) Simon’s Restaurant:
For those youngsters still in high school who had their mom drop them off at the Friday night football game completely plastered, there’s no easier place to go than Simon’s. The cream of chicken and rice soup won’t keep the UV Blue down, but it will be delicious on the way back up. Don’t forget to leave whatever change is in your pocket for the waitress because tipping is somehow not taught in Villa Park.

Since many of the dive bars don’t serve a wide variety of food besides beer nuts and stale pretzels, bringing food directly to a restaurant and sharing it amongst strangers you haven’t seen since your last high school reunion will make you the hit of the bar. That is, until you wake up and realize you spent $70 on pizza you don’t remember eating.

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