While BC’s campus may seem small and manageable compared to the state school campuses everyone has a best friend at (“No but seriously, it takes me THREE HOURS to get to class!)”, this doesn’t mean that the fifteen-minute cross-campus walk doesn’t present its own challenges on any given day. From daunting omelet lines to dogs, the walk to main campus normally provides quite the taste of adventure. So don’t worry, freshmen, you have more excuses to be late other than mixing up Stokes North and Stokes South. That’s only the beginning.
10.) You underestimated the egg line in Lower and/or Mac… for the fourth time this week:
You’ve woken up early, ran the Res, and are ready to start your day of classes with a hearty omelet. Plot twist, you didn’t realize your workout would include standing idle in line for 45 minutes! By the time you’ve attained your questionable bundle of eggs, you’re completely rattled and running to class. Hello, sweaty!
9.) It took you four rounds of push/shove/punch in Hillside to make it onto the elevator (because GOD knows you weren’t going to take the stairs to Main campus):
Even when you’re first in line for an elevator, it still somehow will always take you at least 10 minutes to make it on due to the blood bath sure to ensue while competing for space. But hey, at least you get to cuddle with your newly made frienemies once you manage to squeeze yourself on!
8.) You were feeling overly ambitious after you beat the egg line and decided to take the Million Dollar Stairs, which meant a ten minute breather halfway up:
Your first mistake was deciding to take the stairs, overachiever. Your second mistake was thinking your spin class-toned legs were a match for the beast that is the stairs. You deserve to be late for that class, asshole.
7.) Some preppy CSOM’er in a suit stole your BC Bolt, and now you have to endure the wait for a decent cup of coffee all over again:
For whatever reason, the Hillside baristas still haven’t upgraded to Starbuck’s groundbreaking “put the customer’s name on the cup to avoid confusion” method (too expensive, sources tell us), so getting that super fancy specialty drink is a risk you’re walking right into. Prepare to watch your cup get stolen 12 times in 5 minutes.
6.) You were trapped by the endless sea of overly enthusiastic do-gooders in the doorways of the dining halls, so naturally you had to stop and hear about their cause:
They’re BC’s favorite nightmare, and you can run and BC look away all you want, but you CAN’T HIDE. Beware of the doorway do-gooders who are sure to nab half your meal plan and half an hour of your time. Be better at the look-away, BC, be better.
5.) Just as you begin to book it across the quad, you spot Professor Greene’s golden retriever. There go your afternoon classes!:
If you’ve wandered across Gasson’s lawn this year, you’re sure to have run into Dexter, BC’s favorite furry friend and massive distraction. Unless you have no soul and hate joy, if you happen to spot Dexter on the quad, you’re sure to lose the remainder of your afternoon to follow him around in awe.
4.) The new, overrated salad bar in the Rat has attracted a swarm of freshman-15-fighting freshmen, inhibiting you and your mac and cheese from reaching the checkout line:
You can’t even be mad when these young dreamers make you late for class, because there’s so much hope in their eyes when they tough out the 3-hour salad line, convincing themselves that their kale mix will fend off the dreaded 15. Embrace the mac and cheese, kids, and save strife for the realists just trying to make it out of line in under 20 minutes.
3.) That one chatty philosophy professor you had three semesters ago flags you down in Chocolate Bar as you try to escape the mid-afternoon coffee break madness:
While it’s a testament to our beloved school that professors somehow remember that really stressful week you had three years ago when your sister’s hamster’s cousin died, it’s never a good sign when one of the wizardly-looking, wise philosophy professors flag you down to “catch up” in Stokes.
2.) The print line in O’Neill ACTUALLY stretches all the way to the Plex:
You manage to leave early enough to give yourself 10 minutes to print in O’Neill before class. You stroll in, ready to go, ID in hand, only to find the print lines winding through the entire third floor, down the stairs, through Maloney, and to the Plex. Didn’t you know procrastination is one of the top skills BC’s admissions counselors look for?
1.) Although you’ve seen it a million and five times, you’re stunned by Gasson’s beauty as you stroll from Devlin to Stokes. Naturally, you have to take a pic:
Whether the sun is rising over your 9 a.m. or setting on your 4 p.m. lab, Gasson’s beauty reigns 25/8, and when you catch her at the right angle, you simply must stop and snag a pic. And to avoid being like the rest of the school doing the same thing, you have to spend 15 minutes discovering a new, artsy angle of the same symmetrical building.