Month-Old Clemson Sorority Little Dropped for Trying to Bring Back Uggs
Within only a month of Bid Day, local Delta Beta pledge Hayley Grant was immediately dropped after trying to make Uggs a thing again.
After showing up to her first sorority mixer wearing Ugg brand designer boots, Hayley was met by looks of disgust at her tacky and outdated fashion choice until she was told by the president of Delta Beta to “just leave and, like…never come back.”
Members of Delta Beta have since shunned Grant on Facebook because of her complete lack of fashion sense and “just gross” outfit. Grant is now featured on 11 girls’ Snap Stories all with variations of the caption “um what.” and also has been untagged by her pledge sisters from every over-filtered Instagram pic. To make matters worse, her big no longer describes her as “literally perfect.”
Reactions from Delta Beta girls at the mixer were consistent in their unabashed hatred of the Uggs. One girl was heard saying, “What the fuck do you think this is, 2006?” Another sarcastically commented to her nearby friend, “Aw, how cute Justine, this girl wants to work the cash register at Limited Too!” A third was merely puzzled as to why she would wear Uggs when it’s raining “‘cause Uggs obviously get ruined in the rain, bee-atch.
The Uggs, found in the back of Hayley’s closet and thought to be a good idea even though, ew, it’s not, had last been worn in March of 2008 at a middle school mixer. After the DJ played the last song of the night (“Kiss Kiss” by Chris Brown), she went to her friend Stacy’s house and stayed up watching Laguna Beach and talking about how Vanessa Hudgens doesn’t deserve Zac Efron until she fell asleep. The next day was unseasonably warm, and they were never worn again until the fateful Clemson night.
While holding back tears outside of 356, the site of the embarrassment, Hayley made the following statement to The Black Sheep: “I really just cannot even right now. Uggs were literally so cool back in the 7th grade. Like, I once bullied a girl because her boots were off-brand, total fUggliess. They were from freakin’ Abercrombie!”
“I just thought that once my sisters saw how cute I looked in them than they’d think it was a throwback. It is Thursday after all. Then, all the hot girls in Clemson would wear ‘em and The Odyssey would write about how Uggs are totally the newest thing. I mean, yeah, these are meant to fit the foot of a 12 year-old and I’ve lost feeling in most of my toes, but they’re hot! Ughhh, just fugg this!”
When asked what her next move is going forward, Grant showed signs of hope as she is expecting to be reinstated as a pledge once she shows up to chapter wearing pink Juicy sweatpants.
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