7 Things at FSU That Will Make You Feel Better
Are you in danger of failing one or all of your classes? Did you boyfriend or girlfriend recently dump you and get with that person they told you time and time again not to worry about? Do you have genital warts? Do you know every word to the song “The Reason” by Hoobastank? Fear not, sad Noles, because The Black Sheep has compiled an extensive list of places at FSU that will boost your spirits during these dark times.
7.) Kellum Hall:
Now a vast, empty waste of space (actually, not much has changed), the gravel lot that once housed millions of bacteria and mold will remind you that nothing lasts forever- not even your 2.8 GPA.
6.) The Leach:
Here’s a place where you can feel shitty about yourself after watching hot people become even hotter! While you bike for twenty-five minutes and think about what you’re getting from Chick-Fil-A afterwards, Brad’s body fat percentage just dropped from eight to six.
5.) Full Condom Dispensers Around Campus:
At least you’re not the only Seminole not having sex. Or maybe your peers are just having unprotected sex, in which case, you still win because at least you have condom sense.
4.) St. Augustine Garage:
Even if you feel about as attractive as the University of Florida’s campus, someone thinks you are beautiful. And what better place to receive such a compliment than on the dirty cement wall in one of the most beloved places at Florida State?
3.) Sod Cemetery:
Your dreams may be dying, but at least they’re not dead, and that’s more than we can say about the teams showcased in our very own football graveyard.
2.) Strozier Library:
Around this time of year especially, everyone that’s at the library is feeling the same as you. No one has showered in days, brain cells are combusting, and there’s salt residue on every table from the tears of stressed out Biology majors. But at least you’re not alone.
1.) A Black Sheep Meeting:
This should honestly be the only thing on this list. In the words of Janis Ian, we are “the greatest people you will ever meet.” Do yourself a favor and find a way to implant yourself into this group- you won’t regret it (or maybe you will).
There it is, the absolute best spots at Florida State University to pull anyone out of a spiraling depression. We’ll see you there, friends.