Top 10 Things to Steal From the GVSU Lobby Shop

author-pic at Grand Valley State University  

Being a college student is expensive. Between buying textbooks and being $5 billion in debt, having any “extra” money to just by noodles is impossible.. Having dining dollars can help lessen the financial burden, but even those run out before you know it. Sometimes stealing is your best option, because, hey, you have to feed yourself cuz the government sure ain’t!  Here are 10 things the Lobby Shop has that are worth taking!

10.) Life Wtr:

Life Wtr’s really just glorified tap water. It don’t deserve your hard-owned cash! But you deserve to drink it. Besides, who would the workers at the Lobby Shop be to deny you water?

9.) Ben & Jerry’s ice cream:

The Lobby Shop bumps up the price of Ben & Jerry’s almost $3, and taking the 50 all the way to Meijer to get some ice cream’s just a waste a time. You have things to do, a life to live, and ice cream to eat!

8.) Pre-made sandwiches:

These pre-made sandwiches would taste a whole lot better for free. People steal condiments from restaurants all the time so you can’t say there’s something wrong with taking some extra bread, meat, cheese, and lettuce while you’re at it.

7.) Sabra hummus and pretzels:

This is the perfect healthy snack to pick up and take to class when you’re in a rush. However, it can get expensive when you live life by the rules. Most students don’t have $3.19 to spend every time they pass through Kirkhof; most students don’t have $3.19 at all!

6.) Sushi:

Now that going to XO’s out of the question, where are you supposed to get your sushi? The Lobby Shop of course! The Lobby Shop has plenty of Sushi that’s way too gross to pay for anyway.

5.) Whole bags of chips:

Life’s about taking risks. Stealing a personal-sized bag of chips may be easier, but it’s weak. Always go for the bigger option, it’ll be more worth the jail time.

4.) Digiorno pizzas:

When you’re broke and have nothing in your fridge, you can always stock up on these little Digiorno pizzas. They’re delicious and just beg to be taken. Besides, the Lobby Shop has a lot of them, they won’t miss them that much.

3.) Starbucks iced coffee:

Coffee is necessary to early mornings, but spending money on it five days a week is a waste and adds up to an extra $100 a month easy. Just take it!

2.) Soup:

At GV, bad weather’s common and that’s what makes stocking up on soup such a great idea since you’re bound to be sick. Take a bunch at once, and you’ll be set for weeks! Just make sure you bring a cushioned bag so the cashiers don’t hear the sloshing in your backpack.

1.) Seaweed:

Trying new things can be tricky. If you don’t like it, then you just wasted money. If you steal new things, you’ll never get to discover new flavors without the guilt of throwing it out if it’s nasty.

Stealing doesn’t make you unethical or a bad person. It just makes you really broke and maybe in jail, but that’s okay. There are plenty of items at the Lobby Shop that you no longer have to miss out on. Rather than being torn between paying the bills and buying that unnecessary energy drink, you can now do both!

*This article is for entertainment purposes only, The Black Sheep does not condone or suggest actually stealing anything from The Lobby Shop. C’mon, if you’re really that desperate go dumpster diving like we do!

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