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Illinois
How To Save Face After Getting Haphazardly Trashed At Legends
There’s nothing shameful about ending another miserable week in Champaign with a Big Cup at Legends...
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Illinois
Underground Cult Gains Momentum: CHAARG Takes Root at UIUC
The unimaginable has happened – a cult Chambana-bred cult has taken root on campus. Referred to...
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Illinois
Top 10 Ways to Spend The $7.87 You Won on HQ Trivia
Every Illini’s new favorite app is HQ Trivia, where multi-thousand-dollar prizes are split up among contestants...
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Illinois
An Attempt to Describe Champaign Bars as Dragon Ball Z Characters
Have you ever wanted to invite a nerdy friend to the bar, but just couldn’t find...
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Illinois
8 Orifices to Hide Your JUUL When People Won’t Stop Hitting It
Bringing your JUUL to the Champaign bars (or the freedom-hating fascist UGL library) is a dangerous...
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Illinois
Report: Everyone From Freshman Year Got Kind Of Chubby
A recent report released by McKinley Health Center states that 100% of the people you interacted...
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Illinois
Slob on the Cob: The Dark History of Morrow Plots’ Secret “Gay Corn”
Fake moon landings, grassy knolls, government experimentation, and reptilian shapeshifters — these seem far-fetched and...
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Illinois
People Blocking the Bike Lanes Are Plants from Big Transport to Force You Into Using CUMTD
James Garrison, director of the CUMTD, admitted last Tuesday that the company has been hiring “plants”...
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Illinois
Bartender of The Week: Sean from KAM’s
Name: Sean Instagram Handle: @seann190 Bar: KAM’s Relationship Status: Married to the game Major: Mechanical Engineering...
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Illinois
Decoding the Hidden Propaganda Behind the Block I
The Block I is the official logo of the University of Illinois, and the most boring...
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What to Do With a Boner Other Than Sex
Here’s what to do with a boner other than sex. 10.) Shadow puppetry: This is one...
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University of Illinois Elects Notable Alum Hugh Hefner as New President
The impending retirement of President Robert Easter has forced the UIUC Board of Directors to search...
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How to Not Get Caught Masturbating
Okay, freshmen. It’s time to address the elephant in the room. By now, everybody has told...
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Booze Review: Bud Light Lime
When life hands you lemons, you make lemonade. When life hands you limes? You...
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Top 7 Bathrooms On U of I’s Campus For DIY Glory Holes
There’s nothing like DIY glory holes to spice up your academic-oriented life. Is it legal? Probably...
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Drinking Game: Space Jam
Everybody get up, it’s time to slam (down some beers) now, we got a real jam...
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Venn Diagram: Greek Life vs ABC Family’s “Greek”
It’s been a while since any of us tuned into ABC Family, but don’t pretend...
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Bartender of the Week: Joseph from KAM’s
Name: Joseph Scheri Instagram Handle: joseph_scheri Bar: KAM’s Relationship Status: Married to my doggo. Major: To...
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6 Creative Ways To Tie Yourself Up on The CUMTD
The CUMTD is more than just your average public bus service. UIUC is blessed with a...
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Top 10: Best Replacement Classes at UIUC
While you may have thought 18 credits this semester was a good idea last spring, at...
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Quad Day, The Black Sheep Style [VIDEO]
We hit up Illinois’ Quad Day to see what’s happening this school year. Oh, and...
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What Do Illini Regret This Year? [VIDEO]
Now that the year is almost over, we decided to hit the streets and ask...
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We Interview Moms on Moms Weekend [Video]
Moms Weekend came and went, just like your dad. We went out to ask questions...
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Unofficial Interviews [VIDEO]
The Black Sheep hits the mean streets of Champaign to see what our fellow Illini...