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An Ignorant Knight’s “Oh Sh*t, I Pay for This” List

Fall semester begins today, which means the average UCF student’s bank account is approaching the negatives– but fear not! Your tuition is paying for more than just your professor’s car and the student athletes’ lazy river.

 

7.) Some TLC at LC:

Head outdoors for some good ol’ waterside fun! You can rent kayaks, canoes, and paddle boards at Lake Claire for free. Most people don’t know about it, but it’s a great way to destress after the first set of classes. That is, until Alpha Delta Delta Phi Tri Delta Kappa meets up there to take “candid” pictures of each other on the dock. Goodbye, relaxation. Hello, all-consuming loathing.

 

6.) Heart Healthy:

Out of shape? Head over to the UCF gym! The free swimming pools, exercise classes, and rock climbing walls are almost worth all that pheromone-induced staring on the first floor. Almost.

 

 

5.) Take That, Dad:

Is your resume lacking? Are you sick of working at Captel? Fear not! The UCF Career Services department is here to check your resume, help you find work, and give you tips on interviewing. Kiss that cardboard box goodbye!

 

4.) Also, Kiss That Ramen Goodbye:

We’ve all been through the “so-desperate-to-eat-I-go-to every-free-food-event” phase. Now, you can skip the events and go straight to the food. Knights Pantry offers free food to students. All you do is walk in with your student ID, grab five food items per day, and head out. Boom.

 

3.) Take ‘Em to Court:

Have you been in an accident? Slip and fall? Call UCF Legal Services! Actually, maybe 9-1-1 first, but then UCF Legal Services! They provide free legal service from real attorneys to UCF students. Unfortunately, court costs aren’t covered so you can’t just go around suing people for cutting you off or drinking your milk.

 

2.) Ride or Die:

Bike N’ Gold, the free bicycle repair shop located in the Student Union, is ready for your bike repair needs. You can even reserve a bike there to use throughout the semester. And if you need a challenge, try riding it in front of the Union on Market Day. Bonus points if you hit one of those yellow bucket beggars.

 

1.) Best Week of the Year:

Homecoming 2017. Prepare to stand in line longer than you thought humanly possible with hundreds of your closest friends, all for free comedy shows, concerts, and food. This is the essence of the college experience after all.

 

If you’re going to shell out thousands of dollars to go to UCF, you might as well know everything you’re getting out of the deal. So try remember this list come September 1st. Because this is definitely worth living in crippling debt, right?

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