First semester is halfway through and it’s almost time to get pre-enrolling for the next one. If you’re feeling, well, lazy, don’t worry because we’ve scoped out some good ol’ fashioned GPA boosters just in time. You can thank us later.
When we asked a C.S. major about it he said about a bunch of mathematical shit, but what we took away was that it’s an easy class for STEM majors without a lot of homework. Plus, you get to look at cool graphs. Like these.
9.) Language of Chemistry:
This is definitely the wild card of the list. Is this class easy? Yes and no. It’s easy for STEM peeps but not easy for anyone else ever. Looking at that first prelim was like looking at a future stripper school application.
8.) Taking America’s Pulse:
Taking America’s Pulse or TAPS is an easy class, but it’s a lot of work outside of the classroom. If you take the class and find yourself having to cold call people for four hours (yes, you have to do that) here’s a pro tip: try using accents on new callers to keep things interesting.
7.) Freshman Writing Seminars:
Who doesn’t love a little danger in their life? The great thing about this pick is that it’s a complete gamble. You could end up with a really chill grad student as a professor, or you wind up with a grizzly war veteran turned German fairy tale expert. Who doesn’t love the Grimm brothers?
6.) Visual Communication:
Yes, everything you’ve heard about comm majors is true. Everyone is an unusually attractive athlete, and everyone . There is hardly any work, and you learn how to manipulate people through pictures. So the next time you send a dick pic you’ll know exactly how to frame your wang in a way that really gets the recipient thinking.
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5.) Outdoor Yoga (or Some Other Obscure PE Class):
We’re all for encouraging PE classes to get people up and moving, and it’s dope that Cornell gives us such an interesting range of classes. Where else can you learn to use your opponents’ momentum against them in judo and how to meditate on the go?
4.) Intro to Statistics (ILR) with Paul Velleman:
We all knew Paul Velleman was the GOAT when he told the class to cop his book on the first day of class. This wasn’t a textbook with a guest feature from Paul, this man (co)wrote an entire statistics textbook complete with graphs and shit! Graphs!
3.) Laboratory in Landscape Archaeology:
You get to watch Indiana Jones in class. So yeah, we’ll see you there next semester.
Yes, you get to drink wine in Wines. Sure, this class might be all schmooze and booze now, but what people don’t talk about enough though is the responsibility that comes with taking this class. The next time you go out for a night of fine dining with your friends it’s on you to pick a lit bottle of wine. With great taste in wine, comes great responsibility.
1.) Intro to Oceanography:
How is a class about learning how to drink wine not number 1? Because, Wines is not taught by the man, the myth, and the legend; Bruce Monger. Bruce wears his heart on his sleeve and gives his all in every lecture, and the only thing he asks from us in return is our opinion on climate change. What else would you expect from a man that speaks all five dialects of dolphin?
Okay, so these might not all be suuuper easy, but this is Cornell so suck it up and enjoy some oceanography with Bruce.