It’s the moment that no one was waiting for: Snapchat is now recording our every move through Snap Map. So all your friends, enemies and exes can pretty much see where you are at all times. Anyone who doesn’t think that’s high-key creepy as shit is honestly completely delusional, but there’s plenty of CU students out there who have absolutely no problem with sharing every waking moment of their lives to all their snapchat acquaintances. While we appreciate your unashamed honesty and openness, there are some times where CU students really just need to go on ghost mode.
4.) When you’re alone stuffing your face at Cosmos on a Wednesday night, completely sober:
The issue with this one isn’t the fact that you’re alone eating pizza on a Tuesday night. We get it, we’ve all been there. Maybe you failed your bio exam, or you miss your dog. Sometimes you need cheesy carbs and to be with your own thoughts. The real issue is, why the hell are you eating Cosmos when Boss Lady and Fat Shack are 2 blocks south, and Kim’s is literally a few steps away? You’re not drunk, so don’t pull that excuse. Either find some better comfort food that won’t give you diarrhea, or go on ghost mode.
3.) Any time you’re at the Engineering Center because you’re an engineer:
Not even you want to think about you. We don’t want to think about you, or all the gross math problems you’re doing, or how much more money you’ll be making than us after graduation. Turn your location off. You can keep your engineer-bragging to yourself.
2.) When you told that annoying guy you met in your dorm that you couldn’t go on a date with him because you had an 8 a.m. exam in the morning but you’re actually shitfaced at Jersey:
Girl, we’ve all been there: he’s nice, sweet, and probably would never break your heart, but he just doesn’t get your heart racing like the Pi Kapp pouring Burnett’s down your throat and feeling you up on a sweaty dance floor does. We know there’s really no way to break it to him nicely- for now, just spare his feelings and go on ghost mode.
1.) When you get MIP’d and sent to detox:
In a few weeks, it’ll be a funny story to tell all your friends, but right now, you’re drunk, dramatic and very, very fragile. So a bombardment of worried snapchats when your friends and family see you’re at the hospital will do nothing to help your vulnerable state. Just drink water, stop thinking about how much this is going to cost your parents and how pissed they’ll be, go on ghost mode and sleep it off, champ.
Buffs, someone really is always watching. Maybe a lot of people. Maybe a lot of creepy strangers/writers at The Black Sheep… anyways, maybe you’ll take a sec to put yourself on ghost mode before your best friend sees you at your ex’s place. What your friends don’t know won’t hurt them, right? Unless your friend is actually your frenemy and you want revenge. Then it will definitely hurt them!
Need something to listen to on Ghost Mode? Try out our GIRL POD!