6 Things to do in 5 Minutes Between Refreshing EWeb for Grades

author-pic at Eastern Connecticut State  

Waiting for final grades to be posted is one of the most stress inducing and troubling periods in an undergrad’s career. Sitting in a chair from Big Lots, eyes honed in and focused on the screen – students anxiously wait for their grades to be posted from their parent’s basement. In this time students at home ask themselves – did I fail that Abnormal Psychology exam? Fuck. I hope not. Am I a success? If so, let a letter grade determine that for me. Well stress no more. Here are 6 things you can do in 5 minutes in between refreshing eWeb for grades:

6.) Take a nap:
A 5 minute nap won’t solve all your problems or change the outcome of your grade, but you’ve got to admit – damn that nap felt great. Picture this: you’re cuddled underneath your Eastern Warriors throw blanket as Morgan Cunningham’s “Oldie’s Come to Life” on WECS 90.1 plays in the distance. Sounds like domestic bliss.

5.) Graffiti your bedroom:
You pay rent at your parent’s place. You’ve got a can of spray paint conveniently next to your internship guide. Rather than painting your room, spray paint the “S” we all came to love or hate during our middle school years, spray the Willimantic Big Head, above your bed, or even write some derogatory language to show how small minded and cool you are. You’ve got only 5 minutes so make it sloppy.

4.) Lock yourself in the basement:
Waiting for grades to be posted is an isolating experience. 99% of the time you are most likely alone. How about taking it to the next level and locking yourself in the basement. You are already there. You’ve got 5 minutes to kill – head upstairs and turn the lock. It is a thrilling experience. May as well commit completely. Bring a tent and sleeping bag – who knows what mysterious voices you’ll hear…

3.) Hack the system:
After binge-watching both seasons of Mr. Robot you’re a certified hacker. Hack into Eastern’s vulnerable system and see your grades. Hell – even better – CHANGE your grades to passing! Mom and dad assume you are an A+ student. Show them for real that you are.

2.) Propose to your neighbor:
This requires leaving the basement and a quick jog. But it is entirely possible to do in 5 minutes. Knock on the door of your neighbor and propose to them. Who cares if you have only talked to them while you were out walking your dog. Get down on one knee and show them how much you love them.

1.) Turn off your computer:
Simply just turn off all electronics. Free yourself of technology. Go walk on Main Street and become friends with the Leopard Man. If that doesn’t sound like fun to you – camp out underneath the Frog Bridge and vlog about the experience.