Christmas is around the corner, and that can mean only one thing… FINALS. Yep, it’s time to finally study those textbooks you rented but never cracked open all semester. With more and more students now lugging books around and trying to look serious, we can’t help but think about where the hell everyone studies on this campus. There’s sort of limited space here, and lord knows no one can study in their beds, and if you think you can, you’re a liar. A good for nothing liar. But if you sneak off to somewhere on this campus, here’s what that says about you as a person.
4th Floor of J. Eugene:
You pursue this quest not for its purpose, but for the impression it gives — it makes you look serious. You enjoy perusing tedious, impressive-looking periodicals, and get a streak of euphoria when the librarian smiles at you. Just having other people around you gives you something to focus on, while you try to open that bag of chips without making any sound. Stop subjecting yourself to the unnecessary torture. You’re a masochist — you don’t know what the hell your notes mean but you stare at them for hours in silence anyway.
1st Floor of Student Center:
You’re more interested in socializing than studying. You’re secretly eyeing out all the hot guy athletes (ladies), or slobbering over those yoga-pant-clad behinds of the girls at the gym (guys). There’s way too much going on, and so you know it really was a waste of time coming here. You’re also probably watching the game on TV, while being continuously assaulted by the smell of food coming from the food court. Oh, one more thing, you’re on the lookout for any CAB or Student Center activities, because it means you get free food!
Webb Hall Computer Lab:
Hello techies’ association. Except access your z drive, you can probably do everything else from your home computer. You’re here because you got into a huge brawl with your roommate and needed time to cool off. You also want to watch a little Netflix but since you forgot to take your laptop with you in your very dramatic exit, you’re saddled with straining so hard to hear your movie over the super low sound because you’re stuck without earphones and you can’t turn the volume up.
Science Building “Patio”:
You want to watch the fishes swim by in the pond. You secretly toss them bits of your bagel, even though you’re not supposed to, and watch as people flit past. You’re freezing, since it’s super cold, but you can’t get up because your legs are frozen stiff. There are a dozen assignments waiting on the desk back at your dorm, but for now, you just want to live in the moment.
So whether you’re staring silently at notes you don’t understand at the top of J Eugene or holed up in Webb Hall with all its wondrous smells, know that we’re all in this hellish finals week together. Good luck Warriors!