It’s the summer season and everyone is trying to do two things: not die of boredom and get the perfect tan. Luckily for you, we made a quick guide for how to get your gator glow on without leaving the swamp.
6.) Do your readings outside:
It’s summer but you’re still in school, no worries right? You’re fine haha. You just have to finish those three novels in six weeks, no biggie. And don’t forget to study for those exams too! Once you start crying from stress, use your tears to moisturize; soft skin tans the best.
5.) Take a walk to every construction zone on campus:
This scenic walk will take you through the entire campus, and will give you a nice workout while you build up your glow. Plus it’ll give you a glimpse into where all your tuition is going.
4.)Wait for the 126 in the sun instead of under the bus stop:
With all the new detours, what was once a simple bus trip down Gale Lemerand is now so long that you need snacks to survive on it. So grab a seat in the sun and lay back while you wait those 45 minutes for the 126 to get to you.
3.) Sit outside one minute for every Preview parent who asks you for directions:
How many times can you say, “Do you see that big tower? Walk straight towards it” before you realize you could have definitely been a Cicerone? Just do your best fielding questions as if they don’t give out maps at Preview. At the end of the day you’ll be so orange and leathery you’ll match every alumni mom’s Dooney and Bourke purse.
2.) Go to Turlington with a petition and stay there until someone actually talks to you:
We all know the struggles of trying to get through Turlington without being bombarded by flyers. Get on the flip side of this and stay in the sun with your clipboard and pamphlets until someone stops to actually talk to you. You’ll probably be there for a few hours, so make sure to use sunblock accordingly!
1.)Roll around in some of the orange paint left over from Newell:
Once UF realized Newell was just a bunch of stairs and there wasn’t much wall space to coverpaint, they didn’t know what to do with all the leftover orange paint they bought. Luckily for you, all those gallons are up for grabs. Just a base coating in this will give you a nice light tan that matches campus perfectly. Go Gators!
No matter which tactic you use, remember to use some sunblock so you don’t burn and become a gross garnet color and end up matching that school north of us. Pretty soon you’ll be able to match every sign on campus and show your true Gator pride.
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