5 Ways to Avoid Wanting to Die While Browsing the UGA Marketplace on Facebook

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If you’ve ever browsed the UGA Marketplace Facebook group, you know that people post anything and everything on this site. We’re talking endless roommate searches, too many “ISO textbooks” to count, and more technology than Steve Jobs would’ve known what to do with. So how do you peruse the most overwhelming UGA group without wanting to die? We’ve come up with several ways. And we’ve included pictures!

5.) Buy All the Pets:

It’s scientifically proven that these little guys are therapeutic, especially the pups. You can dry your Marketplace-induced tears in their soft, soft fur.

4.) Create a Story For People Who Post a Lot:

For example, this guy. We’re pretty sure at this point that he’s robbed a La-Z-Boy and is trying to scalp his findings with the declarative claim that the furniture is “Pet free and smoke.”

3.) Try and Find the Connection Between the Seemingly Random Things that People Sell All at Once:

Now you see, here’s our question. What do these things have in common? What was this person cleaning out in order to come across all these things simultaneously? If you come across a post like this in the UGA Marketplace, there’s more than just the connection between the items for sale that you could engage with to prevent yourself from wanting to die. You could have some serious fun with the “meeting point” aspect. “Little Caesar’s Pizza Parking.” Try saying that five times fast.

2.) Bask in the Stupidity of the Stuff People Think Other People Would Want, But Also Would Pay Money For Or Would Have on Hand:

You know, for that time in your life when you steal the Declaration of Independence and star in UGA’s rendition of 42nd Street. Trust us, we’re just as confused as you are.

1.) Create Your Own Athens Live show Schedule Based on the Ticket Sales:

According to our calculations, there are five shows that people have been talking about just within the past two months. All you need to do is search “tickets” and, voila. You’ve got plans.           

The UGA Marketplace is a big and scary place. People buy, own, and then want to sell some really weird stuff. But having some interactive fun with the things people post can ease the pain of wanting to die. We hope this helps.

 

WATCH: We made Malort cupcakes. They are bad.

 
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