To be young and in love with somebody’s mom. If you’re worried that your man might be one of those fated souls, you’re in the right place. The first step toward recovery is acceptance, so here are some telltale signs that your boyfriend is trying to bang your mom.
6.) He’s begging to have dinner with your parents:
No guy wants to be berated by their girlfriend’s parents under normal circumstances. Something is seriously wrong here, and you should probably jump to the only conclusion that makes sense. This dude wants to bang your mom.
5.) He acts like that guy in The Graduate:
Is he a listless renegade caught in the throes of post-graduate life? Does he often swim around on the bottom of his pool with scuba gear on? Does he take you to strip clubs and act like a dick? If the answer to any of those questions was ‘yes,’ then you might have a problem on your hands.
4.) He changed his relationship status to “Its Complicated”:
There’s definitely something sketchy going on. There are only two possible explanations for him changing his status to “Its Complicated.” The first reason is that your relationship is complicated for reasons other than his uncontrollable urge to get with your mom, and the second reason is that he’s trying to bang your mom. So, that’s a 50/50 chance right there.
3.) He watches Martha Stewart on the reg:
Look, nobody is denying that Martha Stewart has some seriously crafty home improvement tips, but she’s also a bonafide MILF. Coincidence? Probably not. It might be time to seek out some counseling. Stay strong.
2.) You have a hot mom:
The chances of him trying to bang your mom go up exponentially if she’s a sexy freakin’ cougar. If she’s anything close to Martha Stewart level, the battle has already been lost. Watch his body language very carefully when he’s around your super hot mom. If he has a boner, chances are he’s into her.
1.) You’re also a mom:
It seems that the apple doesn’t fall very far from the tree. At this point, you’re sort of just asking him to make sweet love to your mom. You probably met him on meethotmoms.com.
If any of these apply to you or your boyfriend, it’s probably best that you just end the relationship right now to avoid any complications.
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