StegMania is happening this Friday night at 7:30 p.m., and people seem to give a shit about it, so reporters at The Black Sheep decided to check out the details and report back.
And what we found is truly upsetting. Bojangles is giving away free food and t-shirts to the first 1,500 students who attend, but they haven’t said anything about providing free drinks with those dry-ass chicken biscuits.
“If you know anything about Bojangles, then you know what happens when you eat one of their biscuits without a drink,” said Claire Jensen, a UGA sophomore. “It’s a slow death, inevitable and somewhat enjoyable, as you slowly choke on dry floury goodness. Is it worth it? Probably, but that’s beside the point.”
The Black Sheep is banding together with several other on-campus organizations to call their local Bojangles joint and yell angry obscenities until something changes.
“Together, we can alter destiny, change the face of StegMania forever, and eliminate the possibility of gridlocking our faces for lack of moisture. You. Can. Make. A Difference. We believe in you. Let’s make this glorified pep rally a resounding success by making those chicken biscuits safe for consumption,” said a local TBS representative.
We want drank and we want it now.
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