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7 Easy Ways to Scam UGA Parking Services This Summer

If you’re paying for UGA parking: 1.) Wyd?? 2.) Where did you find your sugar mama/daddy? and 3.) Help me, I’m poor. Instead of using your hard earned money to pay off tickets from the greatest scam artists of UGA, save that cash so you can spend it on better things, such as Mama’s Boy and the weed you smoke before going to Mama’s Boy.

7.) Street parking on E Cloverhurst Ave:

Con: Having to wake up at 6 a.m. to snag a spot and risk having to spend 10 minutes pulling forward and reversing because the people who parked in front and behind you parallel parked too close to you.

Pro: Not having to worry about those dirty UGA parking police ticketing your car.

6.) At the IM fields behind the Redcoat practice field:

Con: It’s in the wilderness, and the closest bus stop is at least ½ mile away.

Pro: You’ll get your summer body whether you want to or not.

5.) Orientation designated parking:

Con: You might awkwardly get caught on the middle of a child fighting their parents.

Pro: You can record them fighting and put it on UGA Old Row.

4.) Biotest parking dt:

Con: The parking lot is the size of a sardine can, and most of the people there look like they have enough practice to stick the needle in their veins themselves.

Pro: You’re already dt, so you can donate plasma and spend that money at Cutter’s!

3.) Park after 3:30 P.M.:

Con: If you signed up for an 8 a.m. you will miss every single class.

Pro: Free parking everywhere!

2.) Just Uber:

Con: Slightly more expensive than a summer parking pass.

Pro: You can show up to class drunk.

1.) The SLC:

Con: You might destroy your car.

Pro: There’s shade.

Scam the big dawg and don’t pay those filthy bastards to park (until the regular semester starts and it’s back to $300 parking passes).

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