Everyone that has attended one college class in their lifetime understands the fact that your time spent at university is one of the most stressful times in your life. We could all use a little pick-me-up from time to time. Unlike meaningless likes on social media, positive, heartfelt messages on bathroom stalls can help us avoid an existential crisis while on the shitter. Here are some of Grand Valley’s most positive bathroom quotes:
5.) “Don’t tell me that while I’m shitting” (Padnos 2nd Floor Women’s Bathroom, Stall 1):
Obviously, someone was having a hard time staying positive. An anonymous Laker wanted to put a smile on the face of the reader, but the user didn’t find it amusing. It makes sense why you wouldn’t want to flail your feet around in a 3×5 foot stall, so you can’t blame them for being upset.
4.) “You wrote it so it’s true” (Mak 1st Floor Men’s Bathroom, C Wing, Stall 1):
This quote was super deep, as no one has a clue to what they mean. One theory is that there were two quotes on the door, but the janitor erased the first quote, and the quote pictured was a response to another Laker’s graffiti. The second theory is the quote was a calculus professor commenting on a student’s integration word problem on the bathroom stall, but a janitor erased the story problem. We’ll never know the truth behind this quote, but the philosophical pondering behind it is enough to inspire any Laker.
3.) “Hi” (Mak 1st Floor Men’s Bathroom, A Wing, Stall 4):
It’s common in today’s world to go through an entire day without someone saying “hi” to you. Sometimes all it takes is one person vandalizing the inside of a restroom stall to turn your day around. Say “hi” to someone, even if it involves taking a sharpie to a wall.
2.) “Drop bars, not bombs” (Mak 2nd Floor Men’s Bathroom, A Wing Stall 2):
D-D-D-D-DROP THE BASS. Attention all Lakers, your local SoundCloud rapper will drop a sick-ass beat if he gets 50 likes on his post. While you’re doing your business, contribute to his business by liking his post (his self-esteem depends on it). If you see a Slim Shady stand up somewhere on campus, tell him “I would like to hear your new music” (even though you don’t).
1.) “That’s Right!” (Mary Idema Pew Library 2nd Floor Men’s Bathroom, Soap Dispenser):
The verdict is still out on this one. We’re not sure if a manager wrote a passive-aggressive message to an incompetent worker about putting the soap bag in the dispenser correctly. Why are we at university? To learn something new! They sure did learn something new!
Whether or not you’re reading a creepy engraving of the word “hi” on the wall in a bathroom or reading the passive-aggressive message from your manager left on the soap bag at work, it all depends on the building of choice where you normally do your business. Everyone should take a little time out of their day to read the notes left by fellow Lakers. You might be surprised by what you find!
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