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Grand Valley State

Who’s Who at Mary Idema Pew?

As finals week approaches, we all know that the library will be overflowed with many different types of students from the insane ripping out their hair, to the ones who have given up and are taking a nap instead of studying. For those who have never seen this side of the library before, here is a detailed map of what it looks like.

 

The Chatty Greeks:

It’s technically acceptable to be as loud as you wish so this is where the Greeks get together to hang out between classes. They’re easily noticed from the loud conversations about a party they went to last weekend. They usually sit in groups of three or more with others coming up to have a short conversation before going off to sit with another group of three across the room.

 

The Netflix watchers:

These students have no idea what homework is and they think studying is simply opening their computer in a library and looking like they’re doing something. In reality, they just need a place to chill in the two-hour break between classes or a place with better WiFi than their off-campus townhouse. They have homework, they know they should be studying, they hate themselves later because the Netflix binge was just too hard to resist.

Game Room geeks:

This area has nothing to do with studying and really has nothing to do with anything school related. The play video games and make everyone who walks by sad because they get to play games and other students have to study. It’s cruel really.

It’s safe to say if you’re in the Atrium, you’re focused more on fun than doing your best on your final.

 

Where the serious kids go:

The fourth floor reading room’s a place you go if you know how to open a bag of chips without making any noise at all. This is where all the “serious” students go to study. Even if you so much as sneeze, you die. No really, you’ll die.

 

The nap time section:

The couches on the second third and fourth floors are never used for studying purposes. The students here crash as their minds turn to goo from studying, or sometimes this is the only quiet spot on campus. If a student is successfully studying on a comfy couch, we applaud them.

 

Do not enter:

The printer rooms are a terrifying place that should never be entered. If there is something that desperately needs to be printed before class in 10 minutes, it won’t print no matter how many times you send it to the printer. Students will leave this place in tears or so angry that when they look at the next printer, it senses the anger and automatically doesn’t work either. It’s best just to go to Lake Ontario.

 

No matter how many times you’ve been to the library, you’ll never see it all or be able to find the same room again. With finals quickly approaching, decide who you are (or who you aren’t) and actually you know what? Just find somewhere else to go. You won’t get much done at the library anyway without going quickly insane.

Like booze before noon? So do these guys…

 

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