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6 Sh**tiest Things About Living on UIC’s Campus

Well, here you are: You avoided all possible signs and warnings, and now you’re living in a UIC residence hall. While the idea of finally being able to live on your own was tempting, some soon find that they didn’t really know all they signed up for. We took a look at the main things student residents complain about on the daily and boiled it down to 6 of the worst things about living on UIC’s campus.

6.) The kitchens:

One “luxury” that UIC residence halls provide for students are community kitchens. By providing a place for students to cook and prepare food for themselves, what’s could go wrong? Well just about everything. Nothing says dorm sweet dorm than the sweet aroma of burnt Indian food. Counters, fridges and microwaves look like they haven’t been deep cleaned in a goddamn decade. One look into the Courtyard tower’s fridge and you’re scarred for life. It’s not even the overall crustiness of the kitchens that keep more residents away but the quality of the actual appliance. 

5.) Community bathrooms:
If cleanliness is next to godliness, then the UIC communal bathrooms are deep in the bowels of hell. There’s nothing like taking a nice hot shower next to a wad of hair and a sprinkle of pubes that isn’t even yours. Plus, there’s nothing more annoying than having to share with flip-flops on. The one time the custodian cleans the bathroom is not enough to compensate for all the nasties living in the dorm.

4.) Add some color for fuck’s sake:

Nothing screams “dull” like the UIC residence halls. The dorms are about as welcoming as the hotel from The Shining,and if there’s one thing the resident halls need, it’s for some color here and there to light up the dated atmosphere. Would it kill a painter to add some blue and red here and there? Maybe it’ll make up for all the student apathy and lackluster school spirit.

3.) Study lounges:

If you’re ever feeling lonely, lounge towers are also good places to make friends with your local mice. Usually, there is always someone in there trying to teach themselves how to play that one song that everyone know how to play on the piano, but no one knows the name of it. 

2.) The laundry room:

UIC laundry services is a prime example for how some free things in life aren’t always that great. For about two months—TWO FREAKING MONTHS—about 5-6 washing machines in Courtyard were out of order. Due to this, the Courtyard laundry room literally became Battle Royale. Most of the machines don’t work like they’re supposed to. We’re disappointed but not surprised.

1.) Dining hall disappointments:
The one thing on every UIC resident’s shit list is the dining hall food. The school’s attempt to serve students healthy food hasn’t even worked, with students skipping out on the seasoned brussel sprouts for pizza and onion rings. It’s really hard to enjoy your tasteless mac and cheese when there are pieces of hair in it. At this point, just stick with getting the safest possible thing they offer: cereal. 

 

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