A The Daily Illini opinion column published this week called for the disbanding of campus fraternities and sororities for various reasons, focusing on racist and sexist situations the institution insinuates. Frankly, that proposal is a bit far-fetched. This campus couldn’t survive without Greek life. But what the University of Illinois can survive without are the shitty frats and sororities that refused to give me a bid this fall.
The audacity to reject a brilliant, kind, handsome kid with insane pull at Red Lion is beyond me. Fraternities are known for their insensitivity toward people of different races. How did they already know I was planning to dress in blackface this Halloween? It’s shocking some of these institutions I rushed weren’t a fan of my Native American headdress I wore to their last rush party. I’m just a little surprised about their change in views when it comes to insensitive clothing when they were totally okay with it in the past.
I call for the removal of each and every sorority that rejected me, too. They said to “trust the process” and that “you’ll end up in the house where [I’m] meant to be,” but I spent hundreds of dollars on dresses and wore the same ugly navy shirt for weeks, being chaperoned by girls who couldn’t handle a year of screaming at a guy wearing an ill-fitting wig, like me.
Apparently not a single house bought my fake story about being a girl from Naperville who totally loves Gilmore Girls. If a sorority can’t accept me for who I am, what kind of other fake Bromley bitches did they let in? I bet they didn’t shave their legs like I did, either. When will we get to the day where fraternities and sororities become inclusive to people of all backgrounds, specifically me?
But let me make this absolutely clear: no house deserves to be on this campus if they won’t accept someone like me. These institutions should have realized the impact I would have made. I would have paid my dues late, get sent to standards 20 times and never show up to a philanthropy event. I would have been willing to live in the house for a semester until I decide to study abroad halfway thru because I literally hate everyone in the house. What else could they possibly want in a potential new member or pledge?
Now look: disbanding all fraternities and sororities would be ridiculous. There is no other way to make friends, network or sweep hazing and assault cases under the rug. Every single campus bar that matters that’s called Red Lion would cease to exist if we got rid of any sorority or fraternity.
This column can’t disband fraternities and sororities by itself. It was meant to drive pageviews and to make people in Greek life angry. The university needs to disband the fraternities and sororities that have excluded me from their extremely inclusive clique or, at the very least, give a classic slap on the wrist and a warning to the houses that disgraced me.