Daddy of the Week: Alex from FIJI

author-pic at University of Illinois  

Name: Alex Jiskra
Twitter Handle: @alexjiskra25
Year: Senior
Major: Engineering mechanics
Relationship Status: Taken
Fraternity: FIJI
Boxers or Briefs?: Boxer briefs, got to live life without rules.

Tell us a dad joke:
Where did Napoleon keep his armies? In his sleevies.

Is OJ Simpsons Khloe Kardashian’s real father?:
If the glove don’t fit you must acquit. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Finish this sentence: “If I hear the Justin Bieber version of ‘Despacito’ one more time, I will…”:
Turn that shit up because it’s still my jam.

What are your thoughts on the Daddle™, the saddle for dads?:
Never heard of it, but based on in-depth internet searches, I couldn’t think of a more efficient way to get your child from point A to point B even if I tried.

What kind of music will you torture your kids with on road trips?:
“I Would Walk 500 Miles” by the Proclaimers. Please refer to How I Met Your Mother.

Road head: kinky or a dangerous epidemic?:
You don’t want it, you need it.

The scene at the local bar is getting a little rowdy: does the shirt come off or do you remain modest?:
Senior year! Take your top off!

What is the best song ever made and why is it “Paradise City” by Guns N’ Roses (1987)?:
Who in their right mind can listen to that song and not be brought back to the glorious days of Guitar Hero?

Why do you deserve to be Daddy of the Week?:
My current gym shoe of choice is Asics… you tell me. (Shout-out to Seth Fox.)

Why should people read The Black Sheep?:
What else are you going to do while you’re sitting on the toilet? Let’s be real here.