Name: Michael Sandoval
Twitter Handle: @mjsando2
Major: Marketing and management
Relationship Status: Single
Boxers or Briefs?: Boxer briefs
What’s your pickup line for a girl with daddy issues?:
At least you weren’t aborted.
What’s the sexiest sport and why?:
Inner tube water polo. Maybe not sexy on the surface, but you never know what’s goin’ on down there, especially with an inner tube covering the goods.
Why is it your dream to be buried alive next to Jimmy Buffett when he dies?:
Because it’s always 5 o’clock somewhere.
Do you keep your lawn mowed, if you know what we mean?:
Gotta keep up the manscaping so you don’t catch her escaping.
Make an educated guess of how many children you have:
3, so I can dress them up as Migos every Halloween until they’re old enough to realize that (HOT TAKE) Takeoff is the best rapper of the 3 of them.
Do you have daddy issues?:
Only when I was 17, which just so happens to be the age of consent in IL…I guess.
What’s the daddyest location on Earth?:
From my experience, the highest concentration of OG Daddies are in Newport.
Tell us a dad joke:
I had a dream that I was a muffler last night, and I was exhausted when I woke up.
Why do you deserve to be Daddy of the Week?:
Defending my title.
Why should people read The Black Sheep?:
If you are looking for REAL news in the midst of political fuckery, The Black Sheep® is the place for you.