A popular trend among UIUC students is the creation of Finstas, or fake Instagram accounts where you can post ugly selfies, drunk pictures, and honest captions to a small, select group of friends. Fighting Illini football coach Lovie Smith apparently hopped on the Finsta trend without anyone noticing…until now. Here are some of the most revealing photos from Lovie’s personal Finsta account, @eat_pray_lovie.
6.) Lovie’s First Ever Finsta Post:
Lovie’s premiere Finsta post revealed to us what his non-existent personality is really like. He writes like your 50-year-old uncle who doesn’t know how Facebook works with his “laugh out loud” language, but at the end of the day, it’s clear that Lovie just needs a safe space to express himself through an outlet other than his soft smile. He also calls his fans and followers “Loviebirds” like he is a 17-year-old teen pop sensation, for some reason.
5.) A Cold Relationship Between Lovie and Whitman:
As you can tell by Lovie’s facial expression, getting $21 million to coach a shitty football team was the happiest day of his life, but he didn’t realize that he was getting duped by Athletic Director Josh Whitman. Lovie’s coaching experiences before the Illini consisted of subpar NFL teams, so you can’t blame him for having huge expectations. Apparently, at the end of the day, Whitman is just a “fugly slut” to Lovie. One who can’t be trusted.
4.) A Cute Pic:
Coach Smith’s Finsta isn’t all drama, though. Finstas can be a great place to post private pics that only lucky friends and lovers have access to. Here we see Lovie posting a rare photo with his mouth slightly open, looking cute as a button. Hopefully he won’t delete this simply adorable picture anytime soon, because we’re melting over it!
3.) The Ultimate #TBT:
It’s hard to believe that Lovie ever had hair on his head, but this was before his coaching days. Lovie’s hair was luscious during the wild days of unprotected sex and wars America shouldn’t have been involved in, but the stress of being a lower-tier football coach eventually got to his head. He even admitted that he once had aspirations of becoming a dancer in this heartbreaking post. Nobody puts Lovie in the corner.
2.) Don’t Talk to His Grandson:
Lovie took the time to violently threaten his followers to never speak to him or his grandson ever again, which proves he is a doting grandfather. It’s pretty heartwarming to know how protective he is of his family even though he has a hard time of protecting his own quarterback, Wes Lunt, from injuries.
1.) The Soft Smile Bombshell:
A common campus conspiracy theory is that Lovie doesn’t have a single tooth in his mouth, which would explain why he never opens his mouth to smile. The coach finally came clean and confirmed this theory: he is toothless, and has been for quite a while. A brave Lovie also revealed the heartbreaking truth that he has not had a single chicken nugget in his entire life, even a dinosaur-shaped chicken nugget.
We learned a lot about Lovie’s personal life via his Finsta. You can take a look at more exclusive Lovie Smith Finsta content by requesting to follow his account @eat_pray_lovie. Become one of Lovie’s beloved lovebirds (he follows back!)