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Busload of ISU Kids Planning to Crash UIUC Students’ Thanksgiving

In just over a week, many U of I students will find themselves back in the suburbs, where they’ll spend the vast majority of time getting lit in their parents’ garage. But come Thanksgiving, some may be rudely sobered up when a pack of ISU students come knocking at their door.

UIUC sophomore Quinn Leopold sent out a mass email warning to fellow Illini after uncovering that at least a dozen of his peers from ISU were planning to go to his home for Thanksgiving dinner. 

“A few weeks back, I was telling my buddy who goes to ISU about how much I was looking forward to my mom’s homemade pumpkin pie, my aunt’s green bean casserole, and my grandpa’s inevitable ramblings about the lizard people. He seemed really interested–almost too interested–and that’s when I knew something was up,” said Leopold. “Next thing I know, he forwards me an itinerary for a short bus routed to my home at 2 p.m. on the Thursday of break.”

Leopold revealed the identity of his buddy in question, Frankie Jacobson, who had this to say about his school’s hijacking of the November holiday:

“I told just a few friends about Quinn’s Thanksgiving, and then hordes of people kept asking me for other addresses of U of I students,” Jacobson remarked. “They’ve been talking about how awesome their meals are going to taste and how they can’t wait to take away another thing the Illini hold dear. We’ve got a fleet of 20 or so buses so far, full of students who are more smarter than the students of any house they’ll be intruding upon.”

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