What’s Overrated and Underrated at JMU?

author-pic at James Madison University  

JMU, home of the Dukes and home of some seriously overrated and underrated things. E Hall brunch? How about Levar Stoney? You have absolutely no idea who that is, do you? Opinions are a lot like assholes: everyone has one and has to use the bathroom so that that’s why we get to share them…  Wait, that’s how it goes, right? Whatever, these definitely need some more attention drawn to them.

 

Underrated:

Green’s:

The hidden gem of JMU dining. If you polled 100 random freshmen less than 25 of them would have any idea that this place even existed, let alone where it’s located. It’s in the basement of Chandler Hall. You know, that shitty-ass dorm in the slums of JMU. The salad bar is the star of the show here. However, don’t, like, start going because then it’ll get too packed and it’ll no longer be a gem.

Our Alumni:

Did you know CNN’s Chief Whitehouse Correspondent, Mr. Fake news himself, Jim Acosta is an alumnus of JMU? How about one of SportCenter’s lead anchors, Lindsay Czarniak? Yep, she graced the Quad in the late 90s. Even the mayor of Richmond, Levar Stoney, is an alumnus of JMU! Oh, yeah 5-time Super Bowl Champion Charles Haley also played football here. However, if you asked a random student they’d might know about one of them.  Enlighten yourself!

OUR WOMEN SPORT TEAMS:

Lacrosse? NICE. Basketball? 4th MOST WINS IN DIVISION I WOMENS BASKETBALL HISTORY. Field Hockey and Softball? CONSTINETLY NATIONALLY RANKED. Field Hockey also has our only Division I National Championship. (Yes, football has 2, but they aren’t for all of Division I) That’s right, one whole national championship more than Virginia Tech has in any sport, in any program, EVER.  Our women’s athletics are absolutely top notch. Put some respect on their names!

Overrated:

 

Our Diversity:

Just the other day JMU tweeted about being honored by INSIGHT Into Diversity for being a “Champion of Diversity.” Yeah, pick your jaw off of the floor. The audacity for a news publication to give OUR university this label is actually an embarrassment for that publication. JMU is a lot of things but, diverse is actually last on that list.

Forest Parties: 

Unless you’re in Greek life or are a freshman, Forest simply isn’t the move. Even during Frog Week when it seems like every single frat is raging, is it actually fun? No. Cops are everywhere. HPD is licking their chops and exercising their hands to, tase, arrest, and write underage citations to the droves of students there. Not only that, you literally can’t move and the hygiene is worse than a 9th century brothel.

E-Hall Brunch:

E-Hall brunch is potentially the most overrated part about JMU. It’s way too crowded and the lines are always obscenely long.  The only reason you think it’s remotely reasonable to stand in line for 15 minutes for a waffle is the fact that you’re disgustingly hung-over.