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Kansas Rides Momentum from ‘Like, Biggest Win Ever’ into Sweet 16

A week ago, college basketball analyst Seth Davis signed KU’s death note. The NCAA Selection Committee pitted Kansas against the greatest 16 seed of all time and essentially gave the Jayhawks no chance of winning the National Title.

Now, some may have heard death approaching and just submitted, but not us, not our Jayhawks. They dug down deep and did the impossible. They knocked off Penn in one of the biggest upsets of March Madness.

After fighting off the ferocious Quakers and overcoming a 10-point first half deficit, the Jayhawks showed exactly why they were chosen as the David to slay Goliath.

“I’m not sure how we did it, but we pulled it off,” said Kansas Head Coach Bill Self. “They’re the best team we’ve ever played, so obviously we’re all pretty ecstatic.”

Following the victory, Kansas improved number one seeds’ records against 16 seeds to 133-0, a mark that would even grow to 135-0 by the next day, before Virginia broke the NCAA record for worst game ever played, losing to the basketball powerhouse University of Maryland Baltimore County by 20 points.

“I’m not sure why everyone was concerned about Penn. To be honest, we basically thought we were handed a win since we didn’t have to play them,” said Virginia Coach Tony Bennett. “Come to find out they mislabeled the greatest team of all time.”

The biggest win in KU history catapulted the Jayhawks into the second round where they messed around and let the Seton Hall Pirates feel relevant for a while, but ultimately pulled the seat out from under them.

“We’ve beaten plenty of teams like them before. Today we just went out there to have a good time, said Devonte’ Graham, the Big 12’s player of the year. “Now we just move on to easier and easier competition. Everyone else just keeps losing, so the field’s looking pretty great for us.”

Villanova managed to squeak out of the second round as well, but the Xavier Musketeers fell short, as the second one seed to be exposed as a fraud.

The Jayhawks eased into the Sweet 16 for the third straight year and are set to end Clemson’s season on Friday night and advance to the Elite 8 for the third consecutive season. The murder will be broadcast live on national television for your viewing pleasure.

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