Welcome back, Wildcats! School has begun and the epic summer you wasted sleeping, watching Netflix, and stuffing your face with Mad Mush Cheesestix, has come to an end. One of the few things that make coming back to UK bearable is the wondrous event known as K Week. While intended for freshmen to show them how amazing our school is, many of the upperclassmen find themselves crashing the best events. Here at The Black Sheep, we have five amazing ways to make every week K week, whether or not you’re new to UK!
5.) Pancakes. Every. Day.:
CSF is well-known throughout the K Week schedule. With their dozens of parties which seem to be teeming with parents and their deadly water balloon fight, we all know that midnight pancakes are a sacred right enjoyed by the best. Unfortunately, after K Week they retreat to only providing these fluffy, chocolate-soaked angels every Friday. It is now up to you to keep K Week alive by organizing pancake gatherings every night at midnight, without exception.
4.) Constantly demand free shit:
K Crew leaders really love pushing the slogan, “If you paid for a meal during K Week, you did K Week wrong.” The K Week schedule is also slathered in t-shirt exchanges and free gear at practically every event. So what’s wrong with never paying for a meal or UK shirt again? Nothing! Because it’s K Week, dammit!
3.) Keep in constant contact with your K group leader:
Remember that overly-peppy K group leader who told you they’d be there for you if you ever needed them? Well, they gave you their cell number, so make sure you use it! Be sure to text them every week with your class schedule and any concerns about upcoming exams and papers. Text them about how much you miss your SO, who went to school 600 miles away. Tell them about every tiny issue in your life, because it’s their job to make you feel special and help you with your problems.
2.) Upperclassmen: constantly give your unsolicited advice to the freshies. Freshmen: bask in the glow of the underclassmen acknowledging you and giving you priceless information:
This is rather self-explanatory. Freshmen obviously don’t know anything, and without the advice of others they’d end up sprinting through the bowl at Willy T., naked and covered in ranch dressing. Actually, freshmen, go do that.
1.) Continue believing that UK sees you as more than a money-filled meat puppet:
Ah, the sweet bliss of being so young and naïve, believing that your sweet dream school truly does love you. It is rather easy to just keep living in denial as scholarship essays are rejected in favor of enticing some high school senior to come here and as you see your Student Center torn to bits for a new one that will be finished once you’re long gone. Just keep on clicking that tuition payment button and believe that everything’s fiiiiine.
With this lovely guide, we hope you students can continue on the spirit of K Week throughout the school year. Good luck, and go cats!