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Maryland Fraternities Eagerly Prepare for Spring Fest Gladiator Matches

Spring Fest has finally arrived at the University of Maryland, and the campus is abuzz with excitement. The weeklong event, formerly known as Greek Week, features team-ups between participating fraternities and sororities, as well as friendly gladiator matches throughout the week. 

“I cannot overstate my excitement for the fights to come,” senior David Foster of Nu Omicron Omega told The Black Sheep. “Only just moments ago have I completed the shining of my trident and the patching of my net. Tonight, they shall aid me in earning my honor, as we cover the Fraternity Row field with blood!”

The weapons are not simply tools to the fraternity members, however. Several of the students spoke to us about the significance of the arms they’ll wield in the arena this week.

“My net, a most useful instrument, holds many a memory for me,” explained Foster. “Though a lowly Zeta managed to tear a portion with his sword, my mighty trident found his gullet with ease. The just and honorable Wallace Loh was kind enough to turn his thumb downward, allowing me to complete the kill. Truly, it was the greatest moment of my brief life.”

“My father, too, used this cudgel when he was in college. He, too, was a brother of Pi Phi Beta, just like his father before him,” said junior Brad Coyle. “This is the second tournament in which I wield it and, like my father before me, I intend to spill as much Omicron blood as the games allow.”

“If you’ll excuse me,” Coyle added. “I must pray to the gentle god, Testudo, before I fight.”

Some members, however, were a bit more reserved in their expectations for the Spring Fest fights.

“Only just last semester was I granted brotherhood, so Wednesday will be my first chance to prove myself,” sophomore Andre Matthews, a brother of Zeta Beta Theta, told reporters. “Though I find myself anxious, I keep reminding myself that I have been learning to more effectively utilize my shield all week. At a minimum, I believe I will survive.”

“And if I am not so fortunate,” added Matthews. “I know that I shall die well, with honor.”

However, Spring Fest isn’t all about competition. The purpose of the event is to bring fraternities and sororities closer together.

“When I see a Kappa slain at the end of a fight, I look to the Zetas as they, too, look to us,” explained Anthony Ferraro of Sigma Kappa Nu. “We smile, knowing that another of their scourge has been wiped from this plane of existence. This bonds us.”

“Plus,” added Ferraro. “Removing the bodies is a bit of a team effort, so there’s that.” 

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