Maryland Midterm Madness: What Our Professors Don’t Understand

author-pic at University of Maryland  

As many of you have realized, it is that time of year again in which there is no sleep to be had and not a seat in McKeldin to be found. That’s right; it’s time for midterms. Many of you may already be seasoned all-nighter warriors  getting that last bit of studying in, or living, breathing, and sleeping lecture notes and practice problems.  You tell yourselves “well, after this week things will be better” until you realize that the midterms never really end; they just rotate.

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Most Maryland professors seem to misunderstand what exactly a midterm exam is. By definition, it is an exam to be given in, or around, the middle of the semester or “term.” Now, “middle” tends to mean in “half” or “half way through,” so can someone please explain to our prestigious scholars that THERE IS ONLY ONE HALF-WAY POINT which means that there should be ONE MIDTERM EXAM per class, not three. There seems to be some confusion about this concept. It seems that as soon as you finish one round of midterms, your second “midterm” for another class is right around the corner. But, we mean, realistically, who needs sleep right? There aren’t like studies or anything that have been done that say that sleep is necessary for proper daily functioning. Nah, just pass the Starbucks and keep on that study grind.

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Another common misunderstanding about midterms that professors cannot seem to grasp is that the majority of students are taking multiple classes. The average student at UMD is taking anywhere from 4 to 6 classes and most likely has one or more midterms, regular homework, as well as a paper assignment in each. So no, we do not have time to do that last minute assignment you posted the night before it was due. We have to consistently rotate which class we are going to fall behind in, in order to stay ahead of the work, or even keep up with the work, in another class. But don’t worry, Dr. Inconsiderate; it will be your turn next week to be at the top of our priority list.

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With everything going on this time of the year, scholastically and otherwise, things can get a bit crazy, but it’s important to remember that the $100,000 piece of paper you’ll get at the end of your four years should, theoretically, be worth it! Good luck to our fellow Terps from us here at The Black Sheep. We understand your pain and honor your sacrifice. Don’t forget your offerings to Testudo, and may the curve be ever in your favor!

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