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The Ultimate UMD Snow Day Itinerary


If you’ve lived in Maryland for any period of time, you know that even the mere mention of the word “snow” can cancel school for a day or two, and yesterday, that’s exactly what happened. The campus shut down at 9 p.m. yesterday and that’s when the snarty (snow party) started. However, the most important question remains to be answered: how are you going to spend your snow day in College Park?


8:00 a.m.: You wake up, having forgotten to turn off your alarm for your 9 a.m., and you’re ticked off by the noise. Until, of course, you realize: it’s a snow day!


8:08 a.m.: You find out that you accidentally hit snooze instead of turning off your alarm at 8. More noise. Still a snow day.


9:00 a.m.: A wave of hunger rips through you worse than a fart in church and you get ready to go to the diner. You find out it doesn’t open until 11.


9:02 a.m.: Realize that the bus isn’t running either, so you have no choice but to walk to either the convenience store or Route 1 for food.


9:16 a.m.: Find a container of Easy Mac rolling around under your bed and wonder how old it is.


10:04 a.m.: Decide to walk down to Bagel Place because the Easy Mac wasn’t looking too good.


10:29 a.m.: Sink your teeth into your bagel and smile through a mouthful of cream cheese.


11:09 a.m.: Your friends text you, bombarding you with addresses for snowcials and begging you to come out with them.


12:00 p.m.: Check your phone again to see a Facebook reminder about the snowball fight in front of McKeldin.


12:04 p.m.: Convince your roommates/floormates to go to the snowball fight with you.


12:17 p.m.: Snowball fight!


12:30 p.m.: Get hit directly in the face. Pretend it didn’t hurt.


12:58 p.m.: Get back to your room freezing and completely soaked, with ice forming in your eyebrows.


1:16 p.m.: Pregame with hot chocolate and peppermint schnapps because you’re still cold.


1:43 p.m.: Begin making the trek down to Route 1 to hit up a few of the snowcials.


2:07 p.m.: Start drinking.


4:13 p.m.: Fall down ice-covered stairs and into a snow drift because you’re too drunk to walk.


7:29 p.m.: You wake up on your couch clutching a box from Pizza Kingdom containing a half-eaten slice of pizza.


7:31 p.m.: Eat the pizza and start crying about how good it is.


9:09 p.m.: Wake up with the pizza crust lying on your cheek.


9:17 p.m.: Go through your camera roll trying to piece together what happened over the course of the afternoon.


10:01 p.m.: Post a picture of yourself with a mug of hot chocolate taken in an unknown location. At least you look winter-y.


11:25 p.m.: Come to the realization that your snow day is almost over and you have class tomorrow and homework not done yet. Cry a little more.



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