The Ultimate UMD Snow Day Itinerary

author-pic at University of Maryland  

If you’ve lived in Maryland for any period of time, you know that even the mere mention of the word “snow” can cancel school for a day or two, and yesterday, that’s exactly what happened. The campus shut down at 9 p.m. yesterday and that’s when the snarty (snow party) started. However, the most important question remains to be answered: how are you going to spend your snow day in College Park?

8:00 a.m.: You wake up, having forgotten to turn off your alarm for your 9 a.m., and you’re ticked off by the noise. Until, of course, you realize: it’s a snow day!

8:08 a.m.: You find out that you accidentally hit snooze instead of turning off your alarm at 8. More noise. Still a snow day.

9:00 a.m.: A wave of hunger rips through you worse than a fart in church and you get ready to go to the diner. You find out it doesn’t open until 11.

9:02 a.m.: Realize that the bus isn’t running either, so you have no choice but to walk to either the convenience store or Route 1 for food.

9:16 a.m.: Find a container of Easy Mac rolling around under your bed and wonder how old it is.

10:04 a.m.: Decide to walk down to Bagel Place because the Easy Mac wasn’t looking too good.

10:29 a.m.: Sink your teeth into your bagel and smile through a mouthful of cream cheese.

11:09 a.m.: Your friends text you, bombarding you with addresses for snowcials and begging you to come out with them.

12:00 p.m.: Check your phone again to see a Facebook reminder about the snowball fight in front of McKeldin.

12:04 p.m.: Convince your roommates/floormates to go to the snowball fight with you.

12:17 p.m.: Snowball fight!

12:30 p.m.: Get hit directly in the face. Pretend it didn’t hurt.

12:58 p.m.: Get back to your room freezing and completely soaked, with ice forming in your eyebrows.

1:16 p.m.: Pregame with hot chocolate and peppermint schnapps because you’re still cold.

1:43 p.m.: Begin making the trek down to Route 1 to hit up a few of the snowcials.

2:07 p.m.: Start drinking.

4:13 p.m.: Fall down ice-covered stairs and into a snow drift because you’re too drunk to walk.

7:29 p.m.: You wake up on your couch clutching a box from Pizza Kingdom containing a half-eaten slice of pizza.

7:31 p.m.: Eat the pizza and start crying about how good it is.

9:09 p.m.: Wake up with the pizza crust lying on your cheek.

9:17 p.m.: Go through your camera roll trying to piece together what happened over the course of the afternoon.

10:01 p.m.: Post a picture of yourself with a mug of hot chocolate taken in an unknown location. At least you look winter-y.

11:25 p.m.: Come to the realization that your snow day is almost over and you have class tomorrow and homework not done yet. Cry a little more.