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New Year, Same Spartan: 7 Resolutions You’ve Already Broken


The holidays at home were great. You ate a lot, drank a lot, and sat around on the couch a lot. The new year came around, and then you felt the need to make a few New Year’s resolutions and try to stick to them, just like everyone else. The thing is, resolutions are pretty tough to stick to, and sure enough… you’ve already broken them.


7.) Drinking Less:
It sounded good at the time. The thing is, we’re in college, and it’s kind of unrealistic. Chances are you’re about to spend all of your Christmas money at Rick’s on Tuesday, Dublin on Wednesday, and ‘Rama on Thursday. Let’s be real, you’d be better off saving this resolution until you’re out of college.


6.) Look Better for Class:
This one is definitely easier said than done. The first week back, it’s easy to look nice. You got all those new clothes for Christmas, and you just can’t wait to flaunt ‘em. But after syllabus week, it’s all downhill. Somehow, even looking presentable for your 12:40 is tough. So, sweatpants and a hoodie it is.


5.) Eat Healthier:
This is the most cliché New Year’s resolution out there, but probably the most beneficial, if actually done right. Chances are you’ve already eaten like crap since the New Year and you’ve been sitting at home eating chips and pizza rolls. “I’m waiting until I go back to school to eat better,” is a great idea and all, except here in East Lansing we’ve got Conrad’s, Cottage Inn, and Union Late Night. Ordering No Thai is much easier than going to Meijer for some healthy groceries.


4.) Make New Friends:
Meeting new people and stepping out of your comfort zone seems nice in theory, but terrible in reality. New classes just started, and it’s the perfect time to make some new friends; unfortunately, there’s just something about chatting with someone while you’re hungover in your 9:10 class that’s extremely unappealing. Sitting in the back of the class with your hood on and headphones in seems like a better idea.


3.) Exercise:
Note that we said exercise and not exercise more, because God knows getting out of your room for even a little movement is hard enough. With that being said, the 20+ minute walk to and from class can count as some nice exercise, and grinding on the Harper’s dancefloor burns quite a few calories. Better yet, just stick to your daily routines and forget the gym. The walk to Brody Caf counts, right?


2.) Watch Less Netflix:
Okay, wait. Whose resolution was this? To us, Netflix is a learning platform that provides us all with useful information that can better us as individuals in society. Nobody should have to rid themselves of such a blessing, but if for some reason you want to watch less, maybe try limiting yourself to one or two episodes rather than nine at a time. However, a Netflix marathon with some Cottage Inn is always a great time.


1.) Get Better Grades:
If only New Year’s resolutions were so easy that you could just say it and it would happen. Unfortunately, your GPA isn’t going to raise itself. Even more unfortunately, it can easily lower itself, and it’s up to you to stop it. It’s kind of hard, though, when you’d rather binge drink, sleep in, and watch Netflix. Good luck.


New Year’s resolutions are overrated. If you’re really going to try to stick to a resolution, make it realistic and don’t forget that you’re in college and it’s your chance to have fun.


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