Returning Student Drunkenly Orders Con-Wrap at Noodles & Co.

author-pic at Michigan State University  

On the corner of Abbot Road and Grand River, the former Conrad’s Grill is now a new Noodles & Co., open until 11 p.m. on weeknights, a drastic change from the late-night eatery. While this is sure to attract many, students are sure to miss the old Conrad’s. Some, however, refuse to even recognize the change in business.

Any example of this is Chad Pirrone. Severely intoxicated and accompanied by three of his also dazed frat brothers.

“Pirrone stumbled in last night,” said sophomore Allie Jameson who was unfortunate enough to be working at Noodles till close. “After playing with the cool pop machine for 10 minutes, he marched up to the counter, loudly announcing his order of a Number One Con-Wrap.”

Allie’s  of amusement made it clear that this is a nightly occurrence. However, her patient, scripted response was not enough for Pirrone.

“No way there’s no Number One Con-Wrap. Every menu starts with a Number One,” shouted Pirrone as he reportedly pointed at a picture of Pad Thai on the menu.

After 20 minutes of arguing, Pirrone finally agreed to order a Build-Your-Own pasta, consisting of chicken, mozzarella, and cheddar.

“He ordered French fries to substitute the tots, and had enough ranch on his arm from the previous night to make do. Sitting on the ground facing the corner wall, Pirrone sat patiently waiting for his ‘Number One’-style pasta,” Jameson continued. “Listen, I love Conrad’s as much as everyone else, but it was a little gross.”

When his bowl of pasta emerged to the kitchen and was placed on the closest table, where Pirrone sat after his friends lured him to stand with a Chips Ahoy cookie one found in their back pocket. 

Many students, like Pirrone, fail to realize there is a new Conrad’s about a quarter mile away from the old location.