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UM Sorority Shuns Pledge for Ordering Oversized Redbubble Stickers

A near-fatal mistake was made this past weekend when Sarah Peterson of Alpha Potato Pancake received a Redbubble greek sticker in the mail that was 4 inches, as opposed to the standard and widely-accepted 3 inches, to show off on her Macbook Pro, leading her entire sorority to shun her for her lack of judgment. 

The greek letters, which should fit front and center on her laptop, generally looking “busted,” several Alpha Potato Pancake members said. 

“It was an honest mistake,” Peterson said. “And, now, the world around me is crumbling.” 

All through her pledge term, Peterson was super excited to deck out her laptop in Red Bubble stickers, ordering ones from avocados to the classic Michigan sticker. The newest pledge of Alpha Potato Pancake, Peterson thought she had finally found her home with her fellow sisters, though believes that her error will lead to some major repercussions.

“How are we going to throw what we know in the Ugli now?” exclaimed her sorority’s president, Brittany Bumble. 

“I’m honestly a bit ashamed to be in a sorority where members are so careless about their actions,” Bumble continued. “I’m strongly considering disaffiliation at this point. Does tradition mean nothing to these new members?”

Currently, Peterson is unsure of what to do with herself, and has thrown away any Redbubble evidence as she awaits the announcement of her punishment.

When reached for comment, Peterson declined.  

Alpha Potato Pancake is also trying to keep this situation as hidden as possible and are indefinitely suspending all social activity for the upcoming month until Peterson’s fate is decided.

“I honestly don’t understand how she could have done this,” said Peterson’s friend, Jillian James, a member of Alpha Regular Pancake. “It was specified four times in our GroupMe, seven times in our New Member pamphlet, and we were emailed 12 times with the links to the correct stickers. How did Sarah even get into this school, let alone super-top-tier Alpha Potato Pancake?”

“This will definitely hurt us during rush next year,” Bumble, Potato Pancake’s president, said. “I don’t think we’ll be able to get any members if anyone hears of this. If national hears of this, we’re toast for years to come.” 

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