When school first let out, sleeping until noon and binge-watching Orange is the New Black on Netflix were all you needed to feel as happy as a clam (eating whatever food makes clams super happy). But as the weeks roll by, it’s likely that you’ll find yourself obsessively reviewing pictures from the school year and yearning to return to the life of a UMN student.
5.) Avoiding and adoring Goldy the Gopher:
No matter how much school spirit you have, there is always something a little unsettling about interacting with a masked undergrad dressed as a giant mute “gopher” that is anatomically a chipmunk. During the summer months, you might feel a hole in your heart where you once dealt with conflicting feelings about whether to be excited or terrified whenever you saw Goldy suddenly appear at various events on campus. If you are really aching for some obnoxious shenanigans, go watch this, this, and this.
4.) The Danger and Excitement of Navigating Campus (Without Being Injured):
Bikes and light rails and Campus Connectors, oh my! Very few things are as exciting as risking your life while walking to class as you avoid running into rogue Frisbees on the mall and students walking while cramming for a test. Add to this the fact that you are too impatient to follow traffic signals and are an ardent fan of jaywalking, and you have the perfect recipe for adventure.
3.) Sunday Mornings:
If the school week were a full body, Sundays would certainly be the armpit. The weekend is almost over and the only things you have accomplished are eating an entire Mesa pizza by yourself and flipping for free drinks at Burrito Loco. Sundays just don’t seem to mean as much in the summer when you aren’t combatting a pounding headache and the tears that are streaming down your face and smudging your incorrect answers on your chemistry worksheet.
2.) Jokes about Saint Paul Campus:
Despite the fact that telling jokes about Saint Paul is like beating a dead horse with a spiked sledgehammer, nearly everyone on the UMN campus still seems to be under the impression that there is enjoyment in making jokes about the empty, quiet, distant, and animal-ridden farmland. Although you may not totally know it, we can guarantee your eyes miss rolling into the back of your head at the mere attempt at a joke about Bailey Hall or the Saint Paul campus.
1.) When Coffee had Meaning:
While on break, there is more time to sleep until noon, enjoy the sun, and simply relax. Although you may enjoy an iced latte by the pool in the summer months, caffeine simply doesn’t have the same importance when it isn’t the only thing that is keeping you from falling into a deep slumber and drooling all over yourself in the middle of Coffman.
Life may seem dull without the above perks of the college experience, but soon summer will be over and you will be once again aching for the school-free summer. You know, the grass is greener on another planet or something and all that jazz.