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The Black Sheep Staff’s New Year’s Resolutions for 2018

2018! We made it! In 2017, The Black Sheep, holed in a bunker in downtown Chicago, survived threats of a nuclear apocalypse, a water leak, and several empty kegs (immediately replaced, don’t worry). Coming face-to-face with death made us all reconsider what we need to do to make our lives more worthwhile, so the staff came up with resolutions for (what could be) our last year on Earth. 

Read more resolutions in this week’s edition of The Black Sheep’s weekly newsletter (and subscribe!). 


Steven, Lead Good at Computers Guy: 
“Eat better. Take care of this gunshot wound.” 


Mackenzie, Vegetable Murderer: 

“Get rid of the sweet potato that’s been in my cupboard for 4 months.
Stop letting vegetables rot in my cupboards for 4 months.”


Atish, Bruce Springsteen AKA “The Boss”:
“Make my dog Instagram famous.” 


Mike, Didn’t Buy Bitcoin at Right Time: 

“Go to the dentist.
Defeat the dentist in combat.
Become the dentist.”


Andrea, Prefers to be Called “N’drea”: 
“Wear matching socks regularly.”


Colin, Enjoys a Good Laugh:
“1.) Read 35 books.
2.) Sing more in the office.”


Quinn, Actually Never Wears Cut-Off T’s: 

“I don’t make New Year’s resolutions because I don’t believe in self-improvement.”


Addie, Thinks Philadelphia Isn’t Trash: 
“1.) Make Quinn laugh 🙁
2.) Find the amulet and finally emerge from this human carcass that’s hosted me for six-thousand years.”

 

Hey dummy, listen (AND SUBSCRIBE) to our podcast!

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