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Truly Spiked & Sparkling Review

Trying to play catch-up? Drink a Truly Spiked and Sparkling with a hint of lime. High vodka content for a low price, this drink is perfect for the poor and borderline alcoholic college student. It’s guaranteed to go down like water, and get you as drunk as any real man’s drink would. Here’s our Truly Spiked & Sparkling review: 

Grade: A –

Smells Like:
Citrus air fresheners mixed with rubbing alcohol.

Tastes Like:
Citrus air fresheners, with a dash of sorority girl sweat.

Typical Drinkers:
Divorced mother of two who sips her drink as she eyes the pool boy.

– Someone who genuinely thought it was water and is in for a citrusy surprise.

– A guy who won’t shut up about how his friend dared him to order one and pretends to hate it.

User Comments:
– “Sometimes, it tastes like a I’m licking a lead pipe.”  

–  “Why waste $1 on something that tastes exactly like water, at least get a vodka cranberry!”

– “I took a shower after a night of goin’ hard on this and as soon as the water hit my face I projectile vomited.”

– “It tastes like I’m back on spring break in Punta Cana.”

Best Described as a Drink Superior To:
Ipecac syrup, nothing makes it easier to puke than tossin’ back a few lime flavored TSS.

That Aftertaste Tho…:
Leaves you questioning if the pocket change you swallowed when you were little is finally making its way up.

Does This Count in My Fruit Juice Cleanse?:
No Jessica, just because it has lime flavoring doesn’t mean any fruits were juiced.

We Mixed it With:
The hopes and dreams of someone hoping they’ll finally be able afford drinks at times other than happy hour.

 Oh hey, listen and subscribe to Talk of Shame:

 

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