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6 of the Best Walk of Shame Routes at NAU


We’ve all been there, lost, confused, shivering in the skimpy outfit from the night before, and holding our shoes. Just trying to get home after a regrettable hook-up the night prior, but wanting to avoid disapproving glances and sneers at all costs. If you happen to find yourself in this situation following one of the end of the year parties at NAU, here are six routes you might want to take.

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6.) Get to South Campus: Red Route:

South campus is generally considered to be a barren place; only the tech nerds, and delinquents ever frequent there. This makes it the perfect place to travel without being detected. You can get pretty much anywhere you want to go with a fair amount of coverage; there’s more trees, and lots of oddly placed architecture. One of the safest routes takes you a bit off main roads, but this is what you want. Sneak through the walkway at the west side of the SBS. 

5.) Use the Construction in Your Favor: Dark Blue Route:

While we all can’t stand the inconveniences the construction around campus brings, this is one occasion where it may come in handy. Along with everyone avoiding those areas at all costs, you can use those handy tarp-covered fences and narrow pathways to your advantage. Slipping through the opening by Wilson Hall gives you cover all the way to Tinsely, and then back the other direction toward Campus Heights. There’s more construction waiting for you at the top of the hill by Gabaldon, and plenty of buildings to shield you along the way.

4.) A Well Kept Stoner Secret: Yellow Route:

While Reilly Hall and its parking lot do get a lot of foot traffic, taking the route at the east side of the building of it is usually pretty safe. Following the pathway into the more wooded area by the Campus Observatory along San Francisco road will put you right in the middle of everyone’s favorite place to smoke. But don’t worry, the stoner’s wont judge. They never judge. 

3.) Behind/Through Parking Garages: Pink Route:

Slipping past people is easy when you go where no one else does. Besides the old cafeteria ladies looking for a smoke, or half alive drunk kids passed out, you won’t find anyone there. Depending on where you’re trying to get to, you can head toward Knowles, or San Fran. You can take either of the routes to get you all the way to north campus. Just make sure to watch your step, these pathways sometimes aren’t paved.

2.) Trees Can Save Your Day: Purple Route: 

When heading toward south campus, cutting through the forest behind Gabaldon and taking that toward Pine Ridge is your best bet. Head to the east side of Gabaldon, take the stairs, and follow the pathway down. You can continue up the hill between Pine Ridge and McCompton if you want a little extra stealth. You can use the trees for cover. There are no lights along the way, and hardly anyone goes over there anyway. Just watch out for skunks!

1.) Thank The Dead: Green Route: 

When it comes to avoiding attention, nothing tops treading through NAU’s cemetery. On either edge of campus, these hallowed grounds span a fair portion of campus. With large iron gates, loads of eerie looking trees, and plenty of over grown shrubbery, you won’t find better coverage. Of course, at least try to be respectful while there, you wouldn’t want to leave haunted. 

While NAU is generally considered to be a welcoming school, it’s always quite unnerving to trek across campus. Especially alone in the early hours of the morning when you’re dazed, and barely clothed.

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