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How To: Accurately Rate Your OSU Professors On SEIs

 

The semester is almost done which means that SEIs are now being thrown at you like penises at frat parties. Figuratively, that is. Let’s be honest, you have negative seven hours of time to devote to these pieces of paper and online forms on feedback of your professors, so The Black Sheep has come up with a foolproof system on how to complete these forms with the care and ease you have given to your classes.

 

Step 1- Think Of How They Graded Your Last Essay:
Oh, they deducted five points for a spelling mistake? That’s funny because you just deducted five numbers from your original rank and oh, look, they have a zero. Was your professor giving with deadlines or did they make you want to jump off of Lincoln in the middle of a lightning storm wearing a knight’s suit of armor? Consider these instances when you put in your word on their class structure, as well.

 

Step 2- Understand They’re Just Humans (Who Want To Ruin Your Life):
The SEI’s OSU give out ask about the classroom atmosphere and your overall learning experience throughout the semester. Well, if the classroom atmosphere was a satanic cult worshipping how to chemically balance equations that sacrifices human souls if they don’t know how to within five seconds of seeing the powerpoint, then the classroom atmosphere was great! The learning experience was super rewarding while working on a lab report after being up for 27 hours working on the write-up!

 

Step 3- Compare Them To Your Ex Boyfriends:
On a scale of one to stole your mom’s jewelry, how bad are your professors? Do they make you feel good and confident, or make you feel like other girls are the object of their affection i.e., that one girl who answers literally every question. How do you do it, every question girl? How? If your professor reminds you of your high school love who got jealous of you favoriting a celebrity’s tweets, then give that Prof an F and move on with yo life like it’s the summer before college begins.

 

Step 4- Give Bonus Points If They Cancelled Class:
Also consider how soon they notified your class. Was it via Canvas notification or email? 24 hours in advance or fifteen minutes? Had you already woken up to get ready for the class, or did this class cancellation affect your evening plans? If you answered any of these questions positively, give your professor the best grade imaginable and thank them for their impending raise.

 

Step5- Evaluate Their Attendance Policy:
Only two unexcused absences? That’s cute. Unexcused-ly remind them of your stint of mono in the fall that you spread to the rest of your class. Administration will love that.

 

SEI’s are the true voice of Ohio State students that will result in probably nothing, but filling out these forms emotionally or drunk is really fun. So do that.

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