It’s commonly understood by 98 percent of Ohio University students that The Post is less of a campus newspaper than it is an unmitigated disaster. This week’s stories from The Post were no exception, and with about 15 minutes of casually skimming the publication’s website, we found some errors. We would’ve listed more than 10, but we thought we’d save something for The Post’s staff to do, if they ever decide to do their jobs.
10.) This very thorough sentence lets us know that when something is mandatory, it’s also required:
9.) This paragraph refers to a company in the plural, which is essentially the same as using the pages of the AP Stylebook as toilet paper:
8.) This abomination contains two separate errors, proving that after Posties wipe their butts with pages of the Stylebook, they mail those pages to the homes of the people that wrote them:
7.) This litany of commas made us create a Kickstarter to help the staff of The Post purchase semicolons, since apparently they can’t afford them at the moment:
6.) This suggestion that every former band member who has ever decided to start a solo career is one singular, all-encompassing artist. In this way, Justin Timberlake, Fergie, Gwen Stefani are not separate people, but one entity, morphing as needed. At first, we thought this might be some sort of metaphor used to comment on the homogeneity of modern music. But then we remembered that this is The Post:
5.) This quote within a quote never actually ends, leading the reader to believe that the entirety of the rest of the article – as well as every subsequent story published in The Post – is all being said by Bob Boldon. If that’s the case, that man sure does have a lot to say:
4.) This butchery of a verb occurs in the same story as number five on this list. If only someone HAD GONE to the trouble of making sure the piece looked like it was written by someone with a fifth grade education:
3.) This omission of a hyphen implies either that every time a librarian goes on a date, they proceed to stamp on said date, or that librarians are known as hoarders who stamp around everywhere they go:
2.) This absolute ABANDONMENT of the distinction between “a” and “an.” But really, who has the time to edit these days? Not the editors at The Post, especially when they have to get out those hard-hitting stories about movie theaters:
1.) This obscene ending of a sentence with a preposition. OK, we admit it’s become more acceptable to do this in modern English, but when you’re writing a story about how attractive mythical creatures are (watch out, New York Times!) don’t you think you should try to avoid any additional reasons someone could make fun of you?
Have you found a grammatical error in The Post recently? If so, congratulations! You can read!
And if you’re thinking about going through The Black Sheep in search of errors, we’ll stop you right there: There’ll be just way too many to count.
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