6 Things You Won’t Miss About OU Over Break

author-pic at Ohio University  

OK, listen. We all love OU. Everyone knows we love OU. Seriously, everyone knows that we love our school, it’s actually really annoying for people who don’t go here. Some of us may not be looking forward to spending break in our hometowns, away from the freedom and fun that is Athens, Ohio. But after a long, hard semester full of late-night study sessions at Alden and trips up and down Jeff Hill, spending the break at home is an incomparable comfort.

They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, so after a month away from campus, you’ll be ready to go back. But seriously, you won’t miss these six super annoying things about Ohio University.

6.) Nasty Ass Dorm/Apartment Building Laundry:
Whether or not your mom does your laundry at home (she probably does, bless her heart), you’re not going to miss any part of laundry day in your dorm or apartment building. Doing laundry is a chore in itself, but attempting to wash your clothes in machines you share with 100 other people is madness. You can’t trust these people! They’ll leave their dry clothes in the dryer for hours (do they not care about wrinkles?) but when you wait 15 minutes, they throw your clothes on the floor. You definitely won’t be missing this injustice when you’re away for Winter Break.

5.) Motherfucking Parking Services:
Ohio University Parking Services is infamous for giving out parking tickets like they’re Oprah on Christmas day. Lucky for you, mom and dad have a special parking spot just for you at home. You may even get a spot in the garage! You’ll probably still get at least three emails per day about lot closures, but hey, you’ll take what you can get.

4.) Your Stupid Fucking Roommate:
Yeah, that’s right, you won’t miss your stupid fucking roommate or her boyfriend. You said it. It’s out there.

3.) That Shit They Serve at Shively:
We almost called it “food” but we haven’t been able to confirm if it even qualifies. Seriously, at this point in the semester for those students on a meal plan, the shit they serve at the dining hall is almost inedible. You’re probably even a little bit skeptical of the salad bar, like, is this real lettuce or just wet garbage?

2.) The Shit You Take After Shively:
If you’ve eaten at Shively, you know what this means.

1.) All the Nothing:
We love Athens… But it’s in the middle of fucking nowhere. Court Street and a shit ton of alcohol can satisfy our need for entertainment for a few months at a time, but after a while the CI, the Fun Barn and the Applebee’s down the road just don’t cut it anymore. It’s the people that make this town great, but you’re probably pretty sick of all of them by now too.

We won’t miss any of these annoying things while we’re away for break, but there’s nothing that could keep us away from Athens completely. At least we don’t go to OSU, because seriously, just think about how long that list would be. Yikes.

If you woke up this morning surrounded by ravaged Lunchable boxes, this is for you: