7 Rutgers Things This Year’s Freshmen Will Never Know

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Rutgers has gone through a lot of changes in the past four or five years, most of them being new and improved buildings. Like the proper millennials that attend this school, Rutgers has focused mainly on aesthetic improvements rather than what really counts. But we’re not complaining! A lot of these changes have made food like Fat Sandwiches, pizza, and caffeine more accessible, so the new Rutgers freshmen won’t be the only ones gaining an extra 15 pounds. Freshmen, here are a few things you’ll never know about RU: 

7.) The Cabaret Theatre bus stop existed:

Sure, not that many people have stepped into The Cabaret Theatre, but its bus stop got a lot of love. The Cabaret Theatre stop was just before Red Oak Lane and right across from the DSC. It was a perfect stop in a barely navigable campus. There was no crosswalk, we would hop off the F, walk right into the exhaust behind the bus, and into traffic, yelling, “pay my tuition, I dare you!”

6.) Parking on College Ave:

Not that any freshmen babies can drive, but there used to be parking on College Avenue. Like, all the way down it. Now it’s going to be bike lanes (congrats bikers, uhhh we guess) and more opportunities to ticket students who park behind the gym.

5.) When 0ur alma mater neglected women:

In 2013, Rutgers tweaked their gently sexist alma mater from “My father sent me to old Rutgers/ And resolved that I should be a man” to “From far and near we came to Rutgers/ And resolved to learn all that we can.” This sparked some debate—frat bros had their opinions, Douglass girls had theirs, and Henry Rutger rolled around in his grave for at least 45 minutes. The new lyric is a lie, however. Because literally everyone’s from New Jersey, and we all wanna party.

4.) Stan, the LX driver:

Stan the Bus Driver, otherwise know as The Prince Who Was Promised (Game of Thrones fans, what’s up) was the light of the LX bus line. Every student’s hero. Stan’s primary job was to drive buses, but he would make it count by yelling at students that they were “the future” despite how many days of the week it was sweatpants day. Stan said, “You’re doing amazing sweetie!” before Kris Jenner made it a meme. His advice got repetitive, but it’s nice to have someone who isn’t your mom tell you that your degree is worth something.

3.) When The Yard was just a big fence in front of some Porta Potties:

Freshmen don’t know suffering like the rest of us! Though they won’t be allowed to live in The Yard apartments, after a couple years they will. Finally, years of staring at construction sites has paid off. However, a lot of us remember The Yard more fondly as the area past the Scott Hall bus stop where it was smart to stop breathing for a couple seconds since it mostly smelled like fresh construction worker poops.

2.) Having no Starbucks on College Ave:

Until last year, we had three options for Starbucks coffee on campus, THREE! 1.) Transport it from Livi to College Ave on the LX, where it will undoubtedly get cold, melted, or spilled, and then you’ll be tweeted about it for being an idiot, 2.) going to the off campus Starbucks where those two dudes play chess, or 3.) get fake Starbucks at the bookstore. Since those options are all dumb, the best option was shitty one-dollar bean water from Au Bon Pain. Now we can pay six dollars for a grande cup of siren’s tears and a pinch of nutmeg in peace. Yay!

1.) The Meningitis B outbreak:

The best thing about Rutgers is that sometimes diseases one wouldn’t normally get (The “Rut”, we’re lookin’ at you) pop up. Rutgers is always keeping students on their toes! Starting in fall of 2016, all Rutgers students were required to get a painful as fuck, dead-arm inducing vaccine in order to, ya know, not get meningitis B. However, as of this semester, the meningitis B outbreak is a thing of the past. According to the Rutgers Health site, we now only have a normal chance of getting the disease. More diseases to follow in the years to come.

Luckily for the freshmen, most of what changed was actually really shitty. Not you, Stan! Here’s to the next four years of Krispy pizza, good memories, and hopefully no meningitis.

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