Students Mistime Eye Contact on T. Anne Cleary Walkway; Awkwardness Ensues

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Jeffrey Jacobs, a sophomore at UIowa, found himself in a unfortunate situation this morning when he accidentally made eye-contact with another student on T. Anne Clearly Walkway.  

The consequences of mistiming these encounters can’t be underestimated. Jacobs, the brave survivor, commented on his experience: “I was crushed by a cringe so heavy that I felt like I was giving a sweaty sumo wrestler a piggyback ride for the rest of the day.” 

“It was this girl I know from a couple different apartment parties,” Jacobs continued. Well, knew, seeing as I’ll never dare look at her again,” he said.

He was reportedly walking to North Hall, as the girl was leaving the Chemistry building when they met eyes with fifty feet of space still between them.

“All of a sudden I felt like I was on a Victoria’s Secret cat walk in my tightey whiteys,” Jacobs told The Black Sheep.

Makayla Georgeson, the woman in question, said that she had noticed Jacobs “go a little cross-eyed then zone out” when they saw each other. She reports: “I could smell him from a yard away.”

Jacobs continued, “I was so sweaty and anxious by the time I was passing her that I was afraid I would slip in a puddle of my own perspiration. Even the smell of the food truck outside of PBB couldn’t mask my nervous odor.”

Bystanders report that when the two finally passed, Jacobs raised his hand in an awkward wave to reveal a cascading pit stain in his gray hoodie. Georgeson was unable to hold in her laughter until they’d passed each other and were safely out of sight.

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